"Nearly Christmas...."

"Nearly Christmas...."

It's nearly Christmas, I could see it in the shops and I could smell it in the house. My neighbor from Congo is prepairing Christmas dinner with the door wide open, smells good.  This Saturday went fast and there's not so much to tell, I did last of my groceries and bought new slippers. The slippers was about time, a few holes and alot of dammages. I bought them from Canadian tire January 2010, they walked so nice. I walked daily on them, sometimes I just letted them on when Saf and I went for a quick store visit. I wasn't worried about wearing them, I saw worser dresscodes.

I needed new slippers what could hold my 'ach supports' in. In my old slippers the supports went from left to right and from back to forth. I would like to wear the 'supports' 24 hours a day if I could, not sleep with them though, lol. I'm almost positive about it that it will do my hips good. My hips are still bothering me, but I know what to do. Rest, painkillers and wear the supports as much as possible. At 11:30 I took of for my shopping, buying the slippers went fine. I was done in 15 minutes, ofcource I took the supports with me to try them in the new slippers. 

In the grocerie store it was kinda busy, not fully packed, but just a bit busy. I went to another store this time, so it took a while to search what I needed. I really, really couldn't find the salt. I went trough the store four times then I letted it be, it's fine. I payed for my groceries and headed home, it was nice out. Sunshine, a bit colder then yesterday and a firm wind. No snow, no white Christmas this year. The weatherforecast forspelled a 'horror winter,'this winter right! Perhaps January and February brings snow, bring it on!

Christmas eve,' I wonder how my Dad is. With days like these I wish he lived closer, I surely would visit him. I can call him, but Dad doesn't like phonecalls, he rather sits with the person and have a talk then. Feeling just a bit guilty not going to my Dad's these days, only if it was for an hour it would be already good. But I'm tired and I need my rest, and spending a whole day with Dad isn't that pleasant. 

I'm sure he will be fine and I'm sure the nurses there organized something, perhaps a dinner or a game. There's even a little church there, so he will be good. But still.... I just can't bring up the journey to him. (Sorry Dad) Before I go to London I will visit him. For me, I will be fine, I will get trough these days. Just taking my time and enjoy my rest. Though his morning I had other thoughts......

Complain corner. 


"I hope these two Christmas days go by just as fast as they came, there I said it. I didn't want to complain and make other people feel bad who are celebrating Christmas, but, yeah, sorry for that. I made this tiny little complain corner to get it of my chest, it reliefs. Though I will be slightly ready for these two comming days, I haven't got any Christmas decorations, I did that on purpose. These two Christmas days will be days that I rest and relax, sure I will get trough it, with perhaps some good feelings and some sad moments. Thinking back of last years Christmas makes me wanna go back to that time, uhm, to be honest, no, I don't. No more break ups for me please, althought that, I had a good time aswell. 

I can without a doubt say that I had my best Christmasses in Canada.There was the Christmas presents shopping and the unpacking from the presents, I really bought some good and nice stuff, I like to buy gifts for other people. While I'm writing this I feel a bit lonely, and I didn't even expect this feeling. I thought I was going to be fine and okay. But when this day started, sigh! It's like a automaticly feeling, , and it's only just two days. 
I'm a 100% sure that next year it will be different, oh YES! 

Christmas is special no matter what people think of it, it's like something magical happens every year. Okay, let's end this little complaining corner, it's good now. And for now I DON'T want that my friends feel bad or sad for me, please DON'T! There are exciting days ahead of me, oh yes! And for next year? Next year will be a blast, I'm looking forward for 2012! I wish everyone a merry, merry, merry Christmas! And a jolly good new year!

Sometimes the most urgent and vital thing you can possibly do is take a complete rest.

Sometimes the most urgent and vital thing you can possibly do is take a complete rest. 

Such a nice and quiet day today, well, almost then. I did a few things and that was it, rest was on my schedule today and that will be aswell for the following days. I decided to call my Doctor for a appointment this morning, my pain in the hips are bothering me. I can try to figure it out myself to see what the pain causes or I can just leave it, but for just to be sure I thought, "Why not call my Doctor." While I'm there I can ask him for my blood levels (thyroid). I called the Doctor and I could come at 9:30 am, it was 8:30 am so that was perfect.

When I got there a woman approached me and ask me to come with her, hmm, akward cause me Doctor is a he, and I just saw him. Prolly a helper or a assistant Doctor, or it could be the Doctor's wife, who knows. It didn't matter. I told my story about my hurting hips and she asked me questions and later on she looked and checked out my hips. The pain bothers me most when I'm busy at work, you know, long standing, and heavy lifting sometimes. Sometimes the pain bothers me at night when I lay on it, to ease the pain I use painkillers. (Paracetamol) The Doctor told me that I surely could use two tablets at the same time instead of one.

She didn't and prolly couldn't describe what causes the hip pain, I think I already answered the question a bit what causes it. I haven't use the my 'ach supports' in a while with my working shoes, I only use them in my other shoes when I go out doing groceries or when I go somewhere else. And these  going out's doesn't happens that much, I walk or stand most of the time on my working shoes and my slippers, and in these shoes I don't wear the 'supports.' So, that prolly could be causing the hip pain, From Monday of I weared the 'supports' in my working shoes, and from today on also in my slippers. 

The supports in the slippers are a disaster though, they keep slipping out, solution? Tomorrow new slippers, it was about time aswell. My slippers are old, very old, I bought at Canadian tire, and there almost ripped. I walked miles on them, lol! The Doctor told me that it's good that I had vacation, so you can rest and see how it goes then. "You been busy lately you said, now you can rest and take for sure two painkillers when the pain gets worser," she told me. And further I will see how it goes when I  start working again, when the pain comes back then or gets worser I can make another appointment.

I'm glad I went to the Doctor, oh yeah my thyroid blood levels were 'fine,' as the Doctor told me. No information further, just 'fine.' Well okay, I can now just continue with my same thyroid medications for another three months. At the pharmacy I asked right away for a medication travel passport for my trip to London, for just in case. After the pharmacy I did some grocerie and that was it for today. Only there was one thing more, at 1:30 someone called me for a intervieuw, last August I had a intervieuw aswell, that intervieuw is a so called research. It's a normal procedure when someone has left Humanitas, they will get intervieuwed by a company called 'Cito.' 

Cito is a company who will collect most of the information and answers after the intervieuw, and they do a research of how your doing outside Humanitas. Do you manage outside Humanitas?  Can you take care of yourself after Humanitas? Do you need help or not now that you live on your own. What does Cito do with all the information? They want to see if people can handle there selves after Humanitas. In shorth a research. So yeah, in August someone visited me at Humanitas, cause I still lived there back in August. They intervieuwed me more then 2 hours, but today was different, the intervieuwer called me and did the intervieuw over the phone. 

The intervieuw was not longer then a hour, kinda akward though trough the phone, I rather talk or give answers face to face. Anyway, the intervieuw went okay. The nicest thing about the intervieuws is that I get payed for it, last intervieuw I got 20 Euro, today I will get aswell 20 Euro, nice! There will be one more intervieuw next year, let's see how that goes. Yeah it was a relaxing day, tomorrow will be the same I guess. Groceries and further I will see what will happen. Had a nice dinner aswell, after all the Christmas brunches it was nice to just have a plain plate with potatoes, red cabbage and a hamburger.

V.ac.a.t.i.o.n. has started!"

V.ac.a.t.i.o.n. has started!"

It's official now, my vacation has started. I'm looking forward to it, the first few days rest, rest and rest. It's been quit a hectic week, with free dinners, working, visitors, visiting. This morning at 7:15 I took of to my old job at Reha, the weather was horrible. There was a light rain (drizzle?) and it went on and on non stop, raincoat, rainpants, no umbrella cause of the wind. I got soked when I arrived, and the cantine was fully packed with some new people but aswell people I knew. I was excited but tired aswell, and the pain in the hips started this morning early again. I guess I have been to busy yesterday with all the back and forth cycling. I thought, 'Okay, one more day and then rest, let's have fun.' I took place on my favorite old seat and took a cuppa tea.

 It was nice seeing the people I knew again, Mark, Henkie, Margaret, Cyntia, ect, ect. I wasn't planning to do much this day, but in the end I was pretty exhausted. Cleaning, lots of cleaning, Henkie and I did a good job and worked hard. My pain in the hips bothered me so now and then, I told this aswell to Henkie. And he told me that he had the same, he said his working shoes causes him hip pain. That might be my problem aswell, I'm still wearing my 'supports' in my shoes. I will try to wear them as often I can. If the pain gets to worse then I will call my Doctor. Never walk to long with pain, right? Around 12:00 we were done, and I was done too. I wasn't feeling so well, I felt tired and with flashes dizzy, blame the hectic week I had behind me.

But I had fun at Reha aswell, I recorded a few videos, took a few pics, and danced and laughed with the radio on loud. At 12:30 the ordered food for the Christmas brunch came in, all the tables were all set up already this morning. We all gathered around, served our food and start to dig in. There was enough food for everyone. There were three kinds of mash pot as the English say, there was mash pot carrots, mash pot kale and mash pot sauerkrot. I took kale mash pot, it's really the season for kale, we don't eat kale every season in Holland. There was meat aswell, ribs, hamburgers and sausages. First I took one plate but later on I took half a plate more, I didn't want to eat that much, cause I might go to asecond Christmas brunch too at 5:00.

It was nice being together, there's quit a difference thought between the workers from Reha and the workers from Slettenhaar. The half of the workers from Reha have a dissability with working and the other half have problems aswell, homeless, been in jail, problems with getting a job, that's quit a bunch of mixure together. 

The grocery bag I recieved from Reha!

 The workers from Slettenhaar are almost the oppisite, quality workers with almost no dissability, 'normal'workers. Anyway, at 1:30 most of us were stuffed and were ready to go home, thestaff from Reha had a nice Christmas gift for us when we were about to leave. It's quit normal to recieve a Christmas gift from a employer in the end of the year a week before Christmas. 

We all recieved a large designed grocerie bag with some nice groceries, crackers, spaggethi, candy, juice, cookies, tea, ect,ect, it was pretty much, the bag was heavy. Wow, and every worker were getting a bag, I was suprised. I shook both Bosses a hand, it was so nice seeing them again. it's been a while since I saw them, cause I was at my other job. I really am thankfull for them, there done such a great job and they done so much for me, thumbs up! It rained lightly when I went home, I didn't mind cause I was going home anyway. I decided not to go to the other Christmas brunch cause I was full and tired, and my hips hurted again, rest is what I needed. And I took my rest, and that's what I will be doing the following days aswell, rest! 

So, how is it going?

I must say I'm okay, it's been quiet a year. But that's behind me now I would like to focus now on the upcommingyear, 2012. I'm excited about my journey to London, relieved aswell now it''s all settled. I nearly achieved what I wanted to achieve this year, like a job (I'm still keeping my fingers crossed) people around me to communicate and prolly build up new friends ships, I can find such things in vollunteers work or join a club or sport. I'm still working on that, but I want it this way that I can still overvieuw it. I don't want to grab everything all at once, I'm taking my time, cause I would like to keep aswell time for myself. So far I'm doing okay I guess, I still join the free dinners, where I meet and speak people, and then there's the three days of work where I work ofcource but communicate too

I would like to find something for in the weekends, cause in the week I need my rest too. Yesterday I had a phonecall from a vollunteer work agency, I signed in with them online, they will search for me vollunteer jobs. But still I'm keeping the overvieuw, the agency would like to have a meeting with me for a 'getting to know me' conversation. So yeah, vollunteers work agency plus the local radiostation, I'm doing okay, right? Keeping it easy, keeping the overvieuw. About Saf and the kids, sure I still think of them, but not so often as I did a year ago. The hurting is less too, still there is pain, or perhaps I should say wounds, they will stay I guess. That's fine, cause there will be a time where I can perfectly handle those wounds I guess. I don't want to forget my time while I was in Canada, cause that time should be a good memory, ans that's what I want.

2012, here I come!

I got my travel documents this morning!! What a relief! (Long post)

I got my travel documents this morning!! What a relief!

I checked my mail this morning, I was expecting a bill I had to pay, and perhaps my travel documents for London. But recieving them, hmm I gave it a 50/50 chance. I was wrong. My mailbox was packed with Christmas flyers and advertisements, but on the bottom there layed the travel documents. What a relief!! I went trough the documents quickly and saw that I have to be ready on the 30th of December at 6:00 am (early bird) on the trainstation in Almelo. (that's a 10 min walk) Finally I can plan my days before the trip, what do I have to take with me? What must I take with me? Most information about the trip is written in the documents. Oh my God, I'm going to London! For real!

Now I'm actualy realizing it more and more, the date of the traveling is becoming so close now, only nine days! The best about the trip is that I just have to be ready with my packed suitcase and hop in the bus, that's it, everything will be taking care off. The only things I have to do is enjoy and take pictures. Maybe I should get a travel travel insurance, I could have ordered that too while booking the trip, but I didn't. I wanted to book the trip as cheap as possible, I sure will consider a insurance these comming days. It's been a while since I checked what we will be doing with these five days in London, just anxious and worried, lol. Like I said the travel documents what I recieved this morning was a relief. Here's some information about the trip....

I thought we would be traveling with the bus and then a boat, but instead of the boat were going with the train trough the Eurotunnel. The Eurotunnel is a 50.5-kilometre (31.4 mi) undersea rail tunnel, eek! Leaving at 6:00 am and we wil be arriving in London in the early evening. Before we will go to our Hotel we will first visit the London eye, I have been 2 times now in London, but never been in the aLondon eye. Scared of heights? Yes! But I'm going on the London eye this time. After the London eye experience were heading of to our hotel, the checking in will be done by our busdriver aka travelhost. On the second day will we travel to Windsor, sightseeings: Windsor castle and the Towerbridge St. George's Chapel. This second day is New Years eve, we are all able to celebrate New Years at the London Eye or the Big Ben, there will be a huge firework.

On the third day there will be a trip around the City in a doubledecker bus, sightseeings: Big Ben, Westminster Abbey, St. Pauls Chatedral, Piccadilly Circus, Trafalgar Square, Downing street, Tower of London In the evening on this third day there will be perhaps a theatre visit. On the fourth day we will be traveling to Hampton Court Palace, just outside of London, sightseeings Covent Garden. On the fifth day it's bye, bye London. We will be heading home again trough the Eurotunnel by train, when we arrive in Hollan there will be a 'goodbye' dinner to end this amazing trip. I will be right back, I need to whipe of my drool of my mouth! I'm so excited to go, after all the work from this year I surely needed this.

Back to this day, it was a bit of a hectic day. My counselor got a tiny bit upset cause I didn't answer my cellphone, he called twice this week. He called me on a Monday, but I never take my cellphone with me to work. I can't hear the phone ringing while working. Ugh, me and cellphones, I just can't handle them. My counselor sent me a email saying that I need to call him. Well, I need to charge my phone first. It was 8:30 this morning when I went to the grocery store to get some groceries and a charge for my phone. Charging a phone is so easy, but not when I'm doing it, lol. Call the free number, choose the 'yeah that thing' what you need and type in the 14 numbered number. (14! Oh dear!) When I was half way typing the number, a voice suddenly came on my phone saying, 'The number is not correct, it is to short, try to go back to the menu.' Well, I wasn't done yet with typing Miss! LOL!

After trying three-four times I succeeded, don't ask me how I did it, lol, I pushed so many buttons. If I could have a chance to throw that cellphone, I would, I almosted ated it, lol. Anyway my phone is charged! My counselor wanted to drop by this afternoon for a quick visit, that was alright. We talked trough a few things and we tried to solve or figure out a bill, but we didn't succeed. While I was in Canada I was getting montly money from the care allowance but I didn't had the right for that allowance. I will have to pay back a sum of money, from April 2010 till December 2010. The care allowance- a income-related allowance, is a personal contribution of the Dutch government to make the premium for health insurance affordable for everyone. From January 2010 till December 2010 while I was in Canada I didn't had a healty insurance. 

Such a hectic day, driving back and forth. I delivered half of the the German cake what I got yesterday from my Boss to Humanitas today aswell, they were happy with it. A nice gesture, right? I surely couldn't finnish that enormous cake all by myself, it was huge. There was one more appointment I had to do, the local radio station, I had to be there at 7:30. The adress wasn't easy to find, I had to be at the library, on the side of the library was a door with a huge doorbell, on the doorbell was a sign with the saying 'Local radio Almelo.' I had to go a few stairs up and a guy guided me further. While talking with each I noticed that the guy was a bit nervous and hyper, but further he was friendly. He told me every ins and outs from the radio station, and he guided me around  in the studios. This radio station is a 'news' station, news is the most important, music is just a side product the guy told me. 

There looking for a technicus, and for someone on the computer. A technicus is someone who helps the DJ to make a program, the DJ fills in the program and a technicus helps him with pushing buttons, find the right music, ect, ect. I'm quit anxcious about this work, but I'm just going to try it, I never done such work. I know alot from music and I have rhythm and I know from timing, but a technicus is new for me. The guy told me that it's quit simple, you have to see it a few times to see how it goes. And that's what I'm gonna do, on the 7th of January I will have a look with a DJ and a technicus how they make a program, just to get a idea. So yeah, I'm eeeking a bit, but aswell I feel a bit excitment, I'm just gonna try it, for the same reason I will roll into this and that would make me happy.

It snowed!

 It snowed! 

It snowed last night, I opened my windowscreen ans saw snow on the streets and roofs. Always a suprise the first snowfall, lol. Even though I'm 44, I was excited to see the snow this morning. Today was a half day at work, we were all busy with the last orders andofcource  cleaning, It was nice though, and my hips felt a bit better. I putted my arch supports in my working shoes, and it felt so much more comfier. Still a bit of pain in my hips, but the pain was less then yesterday. Around 11:00 after we finnished the last order we started with cleaning, lots of dust and lots of brooms. 

Here it is, the working floor at Slettenhaar. Some lights were still off cause it was early.

At 12:00 all the workers went to the cantine to wait for the food delivery, suprising I see drinks aswell. Suprised about drinks? Yeah I saw beer botlles aswell, I haven't seen that in a while in a factory cantine. We all gathered around and within twenty minutes the food bags came on a forklift, lol! I remembered that a fellow worker told me yesterday that the food prolly won't be that much, "Be sure to prepair dinner tonight," he told me this morning, lol. But the food what they brought was pretty much. Everyone got a plate covered with  aluminium foil with there name on it, plus  a little box with salad and one bread roll. 

Chopped chickenbreast, sliced baken potatoes, and salad.

I ordered chicken, I opened the aluminium foil and saw chicken covered in sauce and sliced baked potatoes, nice! It tasted good, it was for sure pretty much I was stuffed afterwards. I wasn't the only one who was stuffed. Some guys and even the Boss offered me a beer, but I don't like drinking beer in the daytime,  it gets me tired and full, a beer is nice in the evening, when you don't have to go anywhere afterwards, lol. It was a 'okay' time in the cantine, the Boss came sitting next to me for a little while. She asked me a few things about what I'm gonna do in the vacation time, I answered her.The Boss gave a speech aswell, that was a nice experience too. I hope I can stay with this company next year, that would be so great!

The german bread I got from Slettenhaar.

Around 1:30 some workers headed home, I thought it was time to go too. I wished them all a nice Christmas and left, the Boss gave me a nice gift, it was a huge German bread, also known as 'stollen.' ( As tollen is a loaf shaped cake containing dried fruit, and covered with sugar, powdered sugar or icing sugar. The cake is usually made with chopped candied fruit and/or dried fruit, nuts and spices.) Everyone got a German bread ofcource, it's pretty big I think I will cut it in half and give the other half away. First I thought of my neighbor, hmmm, second thought was Humanitas. I think I will give the other half to the crew of Humanitas yes. Humanitas did alot for me and I even didn't gave a big thank you, so there. I'm sure they will like it. 
 

One half for me and the other half for Humanitas.

Vacation time!


Two weeks of vacation, I like to work, I like to do things, but two weeks off can be nice too. I totally have no plans for Christmas, they will come and I will just see what I do. Christmas came quick and I think it will pass quick too, sucks a bit though to be alone but hey, I knew this lonley feeling would come months before Christmas, I'm prepaired! On the 30th of December I will travel to London! I hope it will be a great journey with lots of fun and lots of sight seeings, I'm waiting and waiting and waiting for the confirming mail from the travel agency they want to send me. On the mail there's the last confirming plus the time of the traveling, ect, ect. A week before the 30th I should get the mail said the agency, I know it's not a week yet but, please, HURRY UP!!


This week will be surely busy aswell, there's still two Christmas dinners on my schedule. Tomorrow a little visit to the local radio station in this city. I sent the them a mail asking for vollunteer work, a guy replied, I'm invited tomorrow at 7:30 om, yay and a little eek! Thursday I will be a whole day with my old Boss, I will be working half a day at Reha and then in the afternoon there's the Reha Christmas brunch. I emailed my old Boss asking him if I can help out with cleaning or perhaps another duty, why? Just, I thought it would be nice to have a little Reha reunion. Hold on! Wait..... Do you here that? The water in my waterkettle is boiling, it's coffee time!

You shake it to the lefty, ou shake it to the right. Do the hippy shake shake with all of your might.

You shake it to the lefty, ou shake it to the right. Do the hippy shake shake with all of your might.

I got pain in my hips, and I'm wondering where it comes from. I know my muscles aren't so good as it use to be, I  blame my thyroid disease. When I got pain in my legs or hips I blame it aswell on my thyroid, I have to stand for a long time with my job. Long standing makes your legs hurt, after standing for a long time I bend my knees, and then you can feel them. I should move them more, prolly walk around a bit. I'm sure it doesn't come from laziness, I cycle alot, walk alot and so now and then I rest, that is needed too. A fellow worker told me that he had the same as me, and he told me aswell that he has 'arch supports.' Or how you call them. 

The Wonne Christmas tree!

Just like me he couldn't sleep aswell on his right or left side, cause of his hurting hips. The arch supports helped. Now, I have arch supports aswell, I had them for a long time, and I still have them. But the last half year I have been sneaking around with the arch supports, thinking, 'Ah, it's okay, I don't need them so often Being lazy like don't put the supports in my working shoes but just leave then in my other shoes. When I'm home I'm wearing slippers, inside my slippers I don't have the arch supports. I should wear the arch supports more often, specially at work. Definitly at work, that said the fellow worker aswell. "Your standing for such a long time, you definitly need good shoes." I will start wearing the arch supports tomorrow and more often. 


The pain in my hips I have lately often, but the pain comes and go, then I pay no attention to it anymore. Though this morning and last night the pain was worser, I took a few painkillers to ease the pain. Work went well today, I tried to spare my hips, still it hurted a bit. Thinking of the pain and worry about it makes it worser, I know. 

Dinner was about to start, first lighting the candles.

It was busy at work, an order came in,  that order had to be finnised as soon as possible. Me and a few other workers worked well together to get the order done, that gave a good feeling. A few workers came up to me to ask me if I could stay now for good, yes or no. I answered them by saying that I will this in the first week of January. It's nice to know that they care. 


Another worker asked were Jeffrey was, I answered that he had to go, and that prolly I had to go too cause of the lack of work said Jeffrey. My name was mentioned in Jeffrey's last  conversation, My Boss told Jeffrey that I (prolly) have to go too, according to Jeffrey. A day later the Boss came to me and I asked her about 'Jeffrey's conversation,' the Boss told me that my name wasn't even mentioned, the conversation was only about Jeffrey. Hmm, did Jeffrey lie to me then? I don't believe that. The other worker who asked where Jeffrey was had a simple answer to that, "prolly the Boss lied to you to talk her self 'clean,' she does that so now and then." Hmm, I will see what will happen in January, I keep the 'answer' from the worker in mind. 

Dessert yogurth mouse with two self made cookies.

Well, my first Christmas dinner is done, three more to go. This evening there was the free dinner in the 'Wonne,'  tonight they had something special cause of Christmas. The eating room had a Christmas tree and here and there a decoration, it looked nice and cozy. We had Pasta for dinner and spaghetti. On top a nice salade and as dessert a yogurth mouse with cream. Everything is self made, like they always do at the Wonne. Tomorrow the last day at work, we will work a half day. Then around 1:00 there's the Christmas brunch, a worker told me that it won't be a huge dinner, "They never do that," he said. I will see, and I'm sure it will be fun and delicious, no matter what it is.

Picture time!

This day passed nice and quickly, I took my time and did a few things here ans there. Had a good shower, scrub, ouch, ouch, scrub, ouch, I love my huge scrub sponge, although it hurts a bit, lol. This week will be a nice week, cause it's the last week before Christmas. I'm sure I won't be hungry or starving with all these free meals, lol. I wonder how this week will go, I will just see. Tomorrow is a normal work day, I got my working clothes ready.

It's been a while, so here it goes....Picture time!

There's a little road I like to ride so now and then in this city, it's like a forestpath. Large tree's and a nice brickpath. While I'm riding there I always have a peek at this modern farmhouse.

This is the forest path I'm talking about, it was almost dark, it gives the sky and the picture a nice color.

I should give him a name, lol. Yesterday when I visited my Dad I saw this little pony again. I walked towards him and waved my hand to have a good shot of his face. I succeed!

This picture is taken from out the train, pretty good I think. It was cloudy and late in the afternoon. I like the clouds and the sky in this picture.

Same shot but only five minutes later taken, breathtaking!

I think I posted this picture before but I'm not sure. Oh well, I like this picture. This photo is taking in the same little forest where that farm is standing, these cows are named Highland cattle's or kyloe's, there a Scottish breed.

My favorite little street in Almelo, this street is called Herenstraat, gentlemen street, lol. There so tiny but oh so cute, there still people living in there. They have a great vieuw aswell, a little forest and a ditch.

 Yes, it's that time again, time for the Christmas ornaments in the street, here in Almelo aswell. Some arty and some kitchy and some to much, lol.

Here it is, the Wonne. Every Monday at six I will have my free dinner here. The building is attatched to a church as you can see. The dinners are a bit old fashion, in other words the dinner prepairers gather around to peel the potatoes and make there own salades and gravy. Just like Grandma's always did, lol. That makes this free dinner so comfy.

Another favorite street of mine, Don't know it's name though. But what this street makes so nice are the houses, there like  houses from Amsterdam. I always drive this road when I go to the Banier for the free dinners, sometimes I have a little peek inside the houses. I really like these houses but there expensive, there not for rent, you can buy them.

Once I peeked trough a window (sorry) and saw a drumkit replica from Ringo Star in the livingroom as a decoration. Psst, it’s nr. 23 where you can see it.

 I parked my bike when I decided to do some shopping, while parking I saw this bike. I walked away but turned around again to take a picture, I thought it would be a nice shot. I love bicycles.

Every city has his own Christmas tree in December, this one is ours, it looks nice. As you can see the tree stands in the middle of a pond.

"It was December I still remember."

"It was December I still remember."

Last year December 2010, I still remember that month like it was a few months ago. Sure I still have those moments that I think of my time in Canada, it still flashes trough my mind like little short movie scenes. There are so many scenes though, I went trough many, many things there in Canada. Mostly good things, sometimes I see a scene back in my head and I try to fix that scene, like, I should have done that this or that way. Sometimes when I see those scenes back it brings me a good feeling aswell, it's like having good memories. I like that. Ofcource I miss them, mostly the kids. I miss being around them, miss being the goofy funny Dad, Miss the two little ones. But the missing feels different, I can sorta carry it, or how do you say it in good English? I can sorta handle it? That's the word, I guess. For now I wish them all well and I hope they still think of me so now and then. 

Enough about Canada, back to Holland now. Suprising day today, I  letted this day just come over me. No rush and taking my time. Only the question was, 'should I go to my Dad or not?' The weather looked good, cold but lots of sunshine, no rain! It wasn't until 11:00 'till I decided to go to my Dad's, it was short time though, a quick rest, then lunch, wash up, shoes on, jacket, scarf and hat on, and go! I think it was the first time in my life that I missed the train cause I was late, lol. The train I had to go with was standing already on the platform, it will be leaving at 12:42. It was 12:40 and I was standing in line to buy a train ticket, when it was my time the train left. Oh well, I will have to wait thirty minutes till the next train. The thirty minutes were flowen by just like that, I hopped in the train and there it went.

The Christmas ornaments I bought for Dad, cute right?

When I arrived dark clouds came passing by and I thought, 'Oh no, no rain please, I don't have a umbrella, rain coat nor rain pants.' But yeah, I walked five minutes and it rained, hard! Damn! Looking at the clouds it surely didn't look that the sun would come back, the sky was totally grey. I walked five minutes and I decided to return to the train station, return to home, sigh. On my way back I dived into a supermarket to do my last groceries, I needed just a few things. With all those free dinners I won't need that much food.  Lidl is the name of the market, it's been a while since I have been there. I had to search for the things I needed, I looked for butter more then ten minutes. It's much more comfier somtimes when you known the store well and you know where the grocries are placed. 

Groceries were done and I looked up, the sky was still grey but it was dry, I decided to go to my Dad. I realized that the trian ticket was six Euro and that's a waste of my money if I would return to Almelo. I was half way to my Dad's so, I kept on walking with a heavy bag of groceries, lol. I'm a goose!, LOL! It was quit a walk again, I went to another store before aia went tomy Dad. I want to buy him something for Christmas, I was right on time in the store cause it started to rain again. I saw two little fluffy Christmas ornaments and took them with me, payed for them and continued my journey, gladly it stopped raining. After the twenty minute walk I arrived at my Dad's, he was sitting on his spot on the couch. It was nice seeing him smile, but I could see he was tired. I didn't stay that long so that he could sleep for a little while.

As usual Dad and I didn't talk that much, we said what we had to say and just enjoyed our being together. Oh yeah, he loved the Christmas ornaments, (see picture) he smiled when  he saw them. I stayed for thirty minutes and then I left, I knew the train schedules and I knew how long the walk is from Dad's place to the trainstation. I was tired aswell, just like Dad, he was fine and was doing well. Maybe with Christmas I will visit him again, I should actually, right? It's such a journey though, specially with this cold and wet weather it's horrible. With Summer or Spring it's so much easier on my cycle. I walked back to the train station and saw many buildings and houses what reminds me when I lived here. Memories again, lol. I lived in this village for such a long time, I still know any roads, any ways, and short cuts. Every hop, every store and every building.

He asked me to take a picture of him, so I did. He could use a haircut.

Still I'm glad I don't live here anymore, but for the same reason I could have lived here again. Back in January from this year I was searching for almost a  month for a place to stay, it became Almelo, fifteen kilometers from Nijverdal. I'm glad it became Almelo, I didn't want the same old again in Nijverdal. I'm sure I would return back in my same old. Just doing my daily things, a few house holdings here and a few groceries there, and that was it. Being here in Almelo is new for me, and I love it, I see it as a challenge, I like being here. It gives me a proud feeling, a boost, like, 'hey, look what I achieved.' And there will be more achieving, I'm sure. It's alot easier being here aswell, if I would have lived in Nijverdal it wouldn't be easier, just because it will remind me of my kinda lonely life there back then.

I was fine with it though then, cause I didn't know else, untill I bumped into Saf, she flipped and turned my whole life around. I can perhaps say now, 'it's good I bumped into her, otherwise nothing would have changed.' Akward thought, right? Positive though, I should keep that thought in mind actually. It's been such a hectic time in Canada, a good hectic time, Can I say now was it all worth it? Allthough all the misery and pain from this year, I can say yes! Yes it was! But the proces I'm going trough is still not done, there are still wounds, but that's okay. Like I said in the beginning of this post, I can sorta handle them.

I was exhausted when I got back from my Dad's visit, but satisfied, I'm glad I finnished that journey to Dad's. I realized I need more people around me, specially in the weekends. I should make it a habbit going out once in the weekend, just once is enough. That habbit will come! 

Rain, rain, go away, please come back another day!

Rain, rain, go away, please come back another day!
I woke up at 7:00, I knew I had to go out this morning, checking my blood at the hospital and perhaps later on a few groceries. It was 8:30, I just had a few rice crackers and decided to head off to the hospital. I didn't eat that much cause there's still that question, lol, the question is 'Do I have to be sober before I test my blood for my thyroid.' Some nurses ask me if I'm sober, cause I have to be before they put the needle in my arm, and some nurses say, No, you don't have to be sober,' when I ask for it. I keep it a bit in the middle, I won't eat a complete breakfast, but just a bit.

Before I went out I looked out of the window to see if it rained, and yeah, it rained, and not even a bit too. Sigh, but I needed to go. I putted on my rain pants and grabbed my little umbrella, lol. One huge windhose and that umbrella will be gone, but it's the only one I have for now. Fully packed I took off, no raincoat though just  a wintercoat, it will be a short bike ride anyway. On my way I fought a few times with my little umbrella, lol. It collapsed three times, with the third time I throwed the umbrella away in a garbage bin near the hospital. I couldn't be bothered, I was half wet already anyway.

I bought this chocolate bar cause I deserved it, lol. Just got back from going trough alot of rain.

In the hospital I had to give a form with my Doctor's autograph on it and more information about this blood test, and I had to deliver a sticker. I recently recieved a paper with several stickers on it, with every blood test visit I will have to deliver one sticker. The form and the paper with stickers were a bit wet cause of the rain, most stickers were not sticking anymore. I helped the nurse with finding a sticker what still was intact, lol. The waiting room was packed, but with four nurses on duty it was done in fifteen minutes. It didn't even hurt, lol. I packed myself in again and went to the nearest supermarket, I took my glasses of cause I don't like it when they get wet.

No umbrella, but I had my hat on, though I missed my little umbrella. I bought a few groceries to get me trough this day, cause I don't plan to go out again today in this weather. I got home soken wet, it looked like I jumped in a river, lol. As I'm writing this post my winterjacket is still a bit wet. Tomorrow the weather will be a bit better, I would like to go to my Dad tomorrow. With the train ofcource, I will buy him a small Christmas basket, I'm sure he will like that. But let me first wait what the weather will be for sure tomorrow, it's quit a journey to my Dad's, fifteen minutes in the train, then a 20 minutes walk to his staying.

As you can see my rainpants were just a bit to short. My jeans became wet on the bottom.

Dear Santa!

I believe that you're never too old to make a Christmas wish list, here's mine. I will choose five things....

1) A Christmas stocking with enough money to come around next year. Sigh to all these bills!

2) A bed (I'm still sleeping on a matras on the floor, I'm not complaing though)

3) A wife with two or three kids. (Insert smile)

4) A timemachine so I can travel back in time sometimes.

5) Health and welth to all my friends across the globe.

After Rain comes sunshine, and I ain't talking about the weather.

 After Rain comes sunshine, and I ain't talking about the weather.

Ehausting day at work, heavy lifting is surely not my thing. maybe for a little while but not the whole day. There weren't many people at work, the Boss called Jeffrey aswell, he had to come. Jeffrey was told last Monday that he doesn't have to come back after January cause there just wasn't enough work, he could only stay untill this Friday. He wasn't happy and thanked for this and stayed at home, without saying anything to anyone on the office. After staying one day at home the Boss called him, he had to come. And he came today around 12:00, he was okay. Further not much news about work, I did my job well, learned a few things more and that was it. I was exhausted afterwards, but satisfied aswell. The three days off are deserved.

Vollunteer jobs! 

Yay, I'm starting to get on a roll. I finally found the place where I can sign myself in for vollunteer's work. I was so searching for that place a few times, I Googled mapped, I searched but couldn't find it. It's across the cityhall according to Google maps but... Where? Yesterday I found the place, finally! It's such a little building, it's hiding next to a parking garage. Before the place are standing two huge pilar's almost covering the place, it's so hard to find. But I found it, yay! Tomorrow for sure a vist. Second, I saw two vollunteer jobs for the local tv/radio station in Almelo this week, my counselor pushed me to call them, but phones and me does not work. I decided to mail them and 'eek,' they sent me a mail back. 

A friendly guy called Jan mailed me back telling me that they were very busy at the moment at the radio, but he picked a few days out when I could come for a visit, Jan will show me around then. In the mail was writtin aswell  that I could come in the early evening today for having a look around in the studio.  I answered back telling him that I will come after the free dinner, that will be after 6:00 pm. Wow, a full day then, but okay. First a whole day at work, from there I went to the free dinner, and then.... Then I should have been going to the local radio/tv station, but I didn't go. I was just to tired, and the weather was horrible, lots of wind and lots of rain. 

I knew already that the Jan from the tv/radio station had a few more days that I could show up, I decided to go then. I wanted to e-mail back Jan when I got back from the free dinner, first I took of my wet clothes (I was soked from the rain) and took a shower. Dry warm clothes on, and a glass of warm milk, makes you feel rich, lol. I opend my laptop and singed in to Hotmail, I saw that Jan mailed me back saying that he couldn't this evening, he rather wanted that I come have a look next Wednesday at 7:30 pm. Pffeeew, relieved, lol. My idea was aswell that I wanted to come next Wednesday. Glad afterwards that I skipped tonight anyway. 

Christmas dinner(s)!

So I had doubts that I couldn't join one Christmas dinner, and now I can join many Christmas dinners. On Monday evening there's the 'Wonne,' this is the place where I eat my free dinner every Monday at 6:00. Next monday they want to do something 'special.' This morning my Boss at Slettenhaar said I was welcome too for the Christmas brunch on Tuesday at 12:00. wow, I'm invited. A fellow worker came to me with a list, he asked me what I liked. I could choose, chicken, shwarma, and something else, I forgot the name. I choosed chicken. On Wednesday there's as always the normal free dinner, but on Thursday there a 'special' free dinner. They will be serving special christmas food, this will be at 5:00 pm, on the same day in the early afternoon Reha has aswell a Christmas brunch at 2:30 pm, I'm invited too then aswell, burp!

Today I got a mail from my counselor, he invited me aswell to his city at the place where he works (Humanitas) A few residents there and my counselor are prepairing a Christmas dinner and will be eating it afterwards. My counselor asked me to help out with the prepairing and the eating afterwards, I respond to him and told him that it was a nice gegesture and that I would like it but my schedule is already on Thursday. I think I don't even have to cook next week, or buy groceries, lol. I will take pictures from the many dinners and brunches next week.

"Another shooting,"

 "Another shooting,"

Just after a week after the shooting in my city, there was again a terrible shooting. This time even worser..... This time it was in Liege, Belgium.  3 hours and 15 minutes away from here.

A gunman armed with grenades opened fire on a square packed with children and Christmas shoppers in the eastern Belgian city of Liege on Tuesday, killing four people and wounding 123 before fatally shooting himself in the head. Officials named the gunman as Nordine Amrani, 33, a known criminal who had been summoned by police that morning but who did not show up.

 

Among the passers-by killed when Amrani went on his shooting spree near the city's courthouse was a 15-year-old boy who died instantly and a 17-year-old boy and 75-year-old woman who died later in hospital. A 17-month-old baby also died overnight. A justice official said 123 had been wounded.

This actually scares me, this kinda suicide attempts happens alot lately. It's like crazy people copy each other, like, "Hey, I had enough of life, let's make a mess." This guy who killed himself and took several innocent people with him is a well known guy by the police,  he had grenades with him and a gun. It's crazy, I just don't have words for it. While I was riding my cycle in the city this afternoon I was thinking, 'That terrible accident can happen here aswell.'  

People were walking and doing there stuff, some were in front of my with there cycles, kids were walking with there teacher. Imagine that some insane citizen suddenly throws grenades and starts to shoot, it's possible nowadays. Scary thought, but it's not a good thing to think about, I'm just hoping that it wont happen again, anywhere.

It snowed!

It snowed! 

Just a few flakes though but it's always exciting to see the first snowflakes, right? I yelled a small 'Yay' in the kitchen, but I'm pretty sure that I won't be yelling 'Yay' when the snow is getting to much. Oh well, it's all for free, and I like a bit of snow. I'm happy with my 'Canadian tire' winterboots, there nice and warm, I'm sure they will come in handy this winter. I planned to go to the hospital this morning to let my blood checked for my thyroid, but I didn't go. The weather was so bad, storm and rain, my house was to comfy and warm, I thought, 'The hell with it, I'm staying inside." Friday is a nice day to go aswell, so Friday it is.

My medication for my thyroid is almost done, the Doctor gave me medications for two months, after the two months I will have to check my blood again. I still have enough till January, but I decided to go check my blood this week, cause it's almost the holidays and I don't know if the Doctor's office is closed then. Aswell I would like to check my blood results before I go to London. It's 3:30 pm almost and I'm still wearing pyama pants, lol. Within thirty minutes I will be heading of to the free dinner, before that I want to visit the local tv and radio station in this city. I'm still looking for vollunteers work, and this 'station' had a vollunteer job what I liked. A radio technician... 

'As a technician from Radio Almelo, you are responsible for broadcasting different programs. You will mix the music, voices and, if necessary. telephone guests. You will do this with the Dj who's directing the show. You can move on to be producer and DJ.'

I'm so anxcious to do this but a little voice in me says, "You want this, just go for it!'  I just don't know. Vollunteer work, okay, but if the nerves are to big I should just skip it. It just has to stay nice and enjoyable, going there with nerves all the time isn't a pleasure.  Then I rather pick something else, but let's see what they have to say, there's nothing confirmed yet. I still need to visit them, maybe they have something else for me, for example serving coffee for the d.j's LOL! I don't know, maybe that way I can grow into this radio station. 

My counselor keeps pushing me to do vollunteer work and to get out more to meet other people, it's what I want though doing vollunteer work and meet more people, it's good for me. Sometimes I catch myself flooding back into my same ol' behavior, being a einzelganger. Ofcource being on your own is also needed but I don't want to make it a habbit. So, I don't mind the pushing from my counselor. Sometimes he pushes me to call for vollunteer work, or other things, I so dislike phones, or talking trough phones.

I rather go to them, see them and talk to them. Just like the local tv/radio station, I needed to call them, but what do I say then? How do I start? Yeah, let me just go to them or better send them a e-mail, lol. So, I sent the tv and radio station a e-mail, telling them that I was interested and that I would like to visit them for a short visit. I'm waiting for there response, if I don't get a response before Friday I will visit them, no phone call, lol. While I'm there I will visit the vollunteer agency too, they are in the same neighborhood. Let's see what they have for me, thumbs up for me I'm on a roll.
 

It's been a nice day, I had my rest and did a few householdings. Mostly I rested and went trough alot of flyers, I love to go trough them. In this month I get a load of flyers, I still have flyers from last week what I have to go trough. Another thing, there's a guy and a girl who I know from Humanitas. I see them mostly in the week, there a couple. Today with the free dinmer they asked, ermm told me, "Hey, were gonna drop by for a coffee soonish, I will give you a message when, okay?" Eermm, well okay! I actually didn't want them over cause I promised myself that I rather don't have visiters over from Humanitas or other people that I met in these eight months from Humanitas.  

Specially this couple,  a guy from Humanitas once told me that if you invite this 'couple' there is a chance they will drop by more often. And that's just not what I want. Fair enough! But oh it's so difficult to tell people that you rather don't want them for a coffee or a visit, I mean how do you do such thing? How do you tell that on a friendly way?  "Hey your really nice people but I rather don't want you guys for a visit." ? Hidding for them is not an option, I don't want that. For now I guess I just don't answer the phone, or I just let them come for once and explain them why I just want them for once.