Thursday already...
6:30 am, I woke up by the sound of a kid crying. It was the 3 Year old from Tam. "Shall I get up?" I thought. She was pretty loud cause I could hear her from all the way down in the basement (where she was sleeping) till upstairs in bed, where I was sleeping. I got up and took her upstairs and putted on the TV for her.(Disney channel) It was way to early. It was a day like the last few days. Only I'm getting slowly more and more used to the situation. (I have too) Funny enough I'm sorta getting a little excited to return. Looking forward to the sauna and to see perhaps a few friends again,and see my Dad, if he still wants to see me. I promised him a few times I will visit him with Saf, but our circumstances always screwed up our plans.
It will be though to return, starting all over again, in a new house. I remember when I was living on my own for the first time. It was hard to get it all done, I worked hard for the stuff in my house. It's all gone now, all sold. It will take a long time to find something new again and to start everything over. I Hope to find a friend where I can move in with for a while. Today Saf's brother is coming for a few weeks, celebrating Christmas with us. His name is Dako. I'm looking forward to his visit, he's a nice guy. I wonder how he will react about the break up. I noticed that Saf is sometimes acting different then she use to do the last few days. It's like she doesn't want me to be involved in helping out in the house holding or watch the kids, she told me once "We can manage".
Maybe she got her reason for that. Maybe it's because it makes her feel that were still in a relation, and she does not want that, it must be awkward for her aswell, I just wanna help out, while I'm here, that's all. Maybe it's better to back down a bit then, I just don't like to see people struggle. It was 8:30 pm when Saf's brother arrived. He seemed quiet towards me, it felt he ignored me. But later on he talked to me, I was just guessing wrong. In the back of my head I was thinking "Maybe Dako already knows about the 'break up' and that's why he's ignoring me, I was wrong! Later on me and Dako watched a movie and drank a beer together. Saf had a girls night out that evening. It's all good.
