“Alone, all alone Nobody, but nobody Can make it out here alone” Maya Angelou quotes

“Alone, all alone Nobody, but nobody Can make it out here alone” Maya Angelou quotes

I spend my first night in the house and it went okay, not super, but okay. I slept on a matress, what was fine but the finnishing thouch will be the bed frame, that will come in time. I woke up at a normal time, just like at Humanitas I was early up. Around 5:30 I got up and made my lunch for work and then afterwards my breakfast. At Humanitas I was always sitting making breakfast and lunch, this time I had no chair so I had to stand, that was okay. It's a bit helpless in the house still a bit, but I manage. What I really notice that it's quiet and with flashes the feeling of feeling lonely. I will change that too. 

It was a nice day at work, but sometimes I had that 'different' feeling. It's different when you leave from your house to work and not from Humanitas, aswell making my lunch at home instead of making it at Humanitas. Alot of differences were there this day, aswell the comming back from work, not at Humanitas but home. Henkie waits for me though in the morning, so we can go together on our bikes to work. I pass Humanitas anyway when I go to work, so. I think the 'difference' is  pretty normal when I have been with so many people at Humanitas, 24 hours a day. Aswell my time in Canada, I had a family around me, also 24 hours a day, and we had friends who we invited many times, going out's, etc, etc. 


Although it was sometimes hectic, I absolutly loved it and I miss it. I can say that now, the time in Canada and the time at Humanitas changed my life for sure. I notice that I want people around me, do things, be busy, communicate, you name it. I was taken out of a full Family when I got back from Canada I suddenly had no one around me. Then came Humanitas with many people, that time has passed too and suddenly I'm alone... again.  I think the disliking being alone is positive, right? I have been busy at work, and when I came home I sat down and took a little rest. Flashes of 'being lonely' came passing by, that was the time I notice that I need people around me, friends, or even better a Family. Do I dislike it then being alone now in the house? 

Yes and no, yes, because I miss people around me and no, because I have plenty things to do what I like, and when I look ahead I realize that I still have to decorate my house, that's fun! I look forward to that, when I look ahead I also see that I want to work at myself, achieve my goals.  like I said 'I need people around me,' I will join a club or a sport or whatever. But I will not force myself like, I HAVE to join a club or a sport cause I'm lonely, or I HAVE to get out of the house cause I'm lonely. No, being on myself so now and then is nice too, watching a TV-program or being on the computer or cooking, yeah I want to learn to cook more meals. Gosh, I have so many ideas, I would like to travel aswell, that was one of my goals, remember? 

But first I will have to settle here, and save some money, oh yeah, I will have to take it easy a couple of months.  Tomorrow I will have to do some adress changes, telling important people that I moved, usurances people, dentist, doctor. And Paula will vist me tomorrow aswell, she will update me from last Monday, the signing off. It will be the last time I see Paula then, I sure will miss her. She did so many things for me, she was fun and kind and direct, Paula learned me things aswell, I think a  nice gift will do her good, she's pregnant, perhaps something for the baby she will like. I will have a look.