Mindfullness!
I'm thinking of starting a cursus mind fullness, I actually had contact already with the lady who gives this cursus a few weeks ago, a week after my Dad passed away. I already was interested in this cursus way before my Dad passed away, a week after Dad's funeral I searched for contact with the lady who gives this cursus trough a email. I also told her about my Dad's passing in the mail. She told me that it's not a good idea to start with the cursus yet cause of my Dad's passing. She thought it wasn't a good idea to start this cursus when I was still mourning and grieving, I agreed but not a 100%. The lady told me to wait four or five weeks, or even longer. I waited two weeks, I'm almost sure that tomorrow I will try to get contact with the lady once again.
Yes, I'm still grieving and mourning, but I'm much calmer and relaxed about it, I can't really explain how I feel at the moment, I'm okay. Ofcource I feel sadness that my Dad passed away, ofcource I miss him too, he doesn't deserved this. But, I can aswell say that he had a good life, though the way he lived the last thirteen years since 'Mom' passed away weren't that pleasant. He is happy at the moment, he's with Mom, he's not suffering anymore, the missing of his "all" is over. That's the way I think about it now, 'that' gives me a some kinda reliefed feeling. The decision to start with the cursus mind fullness is because my worries are becoming annoying, almost a problem too.
It's time to work on those worries. These worries are mostly just worries for nothing. These 'nonsense' worries as I call them are becoming a pain aswell, I have sometimes pressure on my chest, a little stabbing pain, and a hurting stomach. They say nerves are always attacking your weak parts, that will be my stomach then. Though, it sounds that I'm a nerves and stress full wreck now, but I'm not! The sometimes pain made me decide that I have to act, act in a play full and enjoyable way. The cursus mind fullness is enjoyable, it will learn me to think differently, learning to focus on other things, etc, etc. My thinking will become easier, and my worries less. The cursus sounds interesting aswell, I like it, I will learn from it. Let's see what the lady will say tomorrow.
Work went well as always today, again a other section but okay, I didn't mind. Working on a other section means aswell working with other fellow workers, we have some foreigners aswell at work, actually alot. There fun and interesting, it's interesting to hear from other cultures. We have Turkish people, Yugoslavian people and ofcource Dutch people, lol. It's a nice mixture. Plans for the weekend? Uhm, yes and no, it depends on the weather. Would love to go to another city (Zwolle) on Saturday, but the weather forecast for spelled grey weather and perhaps snow, I'm so done with this cold weather. This Winter season is taking to long it seems! But Dutch weather can always change, so I will see what it brings Saturday.
