Monday, June 13, 2011

"Another Sunday has almost ended."

"Another Sunday has almost ended."

This second Sunday was a bit the same like yesterday, only the weather was greyer. Today and yesterday I had some 'down' moments, but I can carry them. There not that heavy anymore, it only stings a bit. Sometimes I think to myself, "This feels a bit like a dream, am I really here? Is this really happening? Or, did I really went trough this all?" I'm talking about what I went trough these last six months, and even sometimes the whole 'Canada' adventure. And it was a huge adventure, I surely have no regrets or doubts I went overseas, Oh no!! But sometimes it feels just like a dream, and it all went so fast. When I have my 'down' moments I rather not look at pictures from my time in Canada, otherwise the down moment might get worser. So better not.

I miss the kids, specially the two young ones, Tasn and Ab, bless them, I hope they are well. I don't know what it is with me and kids recently, in Canada I had Tasn and Ab around me, I took care of them and did fun stuff with them, and I loved it! Although they were a pain sometimes, but hey, there kids, what do you expect? And now at Humanitas it's Ricardo, he's attached to me, and I like him too. I like to take care of him when I'm around him or when we go out for a little walk or a bike ride. I like the taking care of, the teaching him well, what's happening? Did I transformed to a Dad, is it perhaps my age, or is it time to be a Dad? Today I spent a few hours with Ricardo and he wasn't so nice, he forgot his adhd medicine. I took him for a bike ride and was prepaired (as always) what could happen. Insults, yelling, everything his way, etc, etc. 

We went quit far with our bikes and it went okay, although alot of curses and insults, but I stayed calm, chin up and ignore. It doesn't help when you give him a big mouth if he's not listening or insults you, it will only get worser. When it not went his way this afternoon he shoutted at me and insulted me alot, I told him that if he goes on like that we will return to our rooms. A few times he went quiet after I said that, but on a certain moment he went to far, and I told him that we will return and I told him why. And I returned, Ricardo was behind me yelling at me, I letted him and ignored him. After five minutes he calmed down, and was trying to give me sorry's, but I wasn't satisfied I wanted a proper sorry. I disliked what he yelled at me this afternoon, it's sure not right for a seven year old. But I'm aware of his sickness, but still.

With such times with Ricardo I rather don't spend time with him, I'm taking my hat of for his Dad how he handles him, cause it's sure not easy. But either way, Ricardo seems to be on his calmest when he's with me. Maybe I got alot of patience, I don't know. Okay another subject, what did I do else this second Sunday? Well, I rested alot, don't know why though, cause where do I have to rest from? I already had three days of rest. Anyway, if the body is asking for it, right? I had two naps today, and they were good. Further I did some cooking and prepaired lunch and breakfast, and that was quit it for today actually. Tomorrow I will be going to work, YES! Funny though that I was such a long time jobless and I was fine with it, but now it's vice verca. I'm happy with it!