Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Honest critism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance or a stranger.

Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance or a stranger. 

Taking critism, I need to learn that, cause I really dislike getting critism. Today I was getting critism at work, but was it critism? My second Boss caught me on making a little mistake while working, although it wasn't that a big mistake, he looked annoyed while speaking to me. My second Boss had to do a little more work cause I didn't finnish a mat on a few points not so well. He was attending me on the mistake, and he told me how to do it and that I need to do it properly. In my eyes it wasn't that a big thing, but after that my Boss attended me I had the feeling that I failed.

My thoughts became worser, In the late afternoon I was thinking already, 'I will get fired', lol. The annoyed look on the Boss his face after my little mistake made it only worser. Or were it just my thoughts? While  writing this now I'm sure it were just my thoughts. I had lessons in positve and negative thoughts, it's so easy while learning it, but in real life... I think everyone finds that sometimes difficult. I sure wont make the 'little mistake' again, I thought this afternoon. I checked every math after I finnished it, I guess I can say I learned from the mistake, but still that 'fail moment thought' was floating around. 



On my first day at work I worked together with another new guy, that new guy came aswell from Reha. So it was  nice working with him, although I see him still a bit as a concurent. ('Negative thoughts,') we are both working for three months, these three months are a test. "What if, he can stay and I need to leave?'  'He works a whole week, and I only three whole days, sure they will hire him for good.' 'Should I try to work aswell a whole week, to just get more chance for the job?' NO!!  My Boss said it's good, I'm doing a good job, they believe in me, so stop thinking, your doing what you can, and your doing it well!  Positive thinking is not always that easy. 

Sometimes I want to prove myself that I can do better, but they are already happy with me, so why would I? Just thew way I am I guess.... Sometimes I want to do the job faster and then I make sometimes these little mistakes. After that tiny little accident from this afternoon I want to pay more attention to what I do, plus pay attention to what the Boss tells me when he explains something. I want to be more 'outgoing'aswell, I am already but in my eyes it's not enough. Be a man, speak up! Ah, I don't have to be concerned, I made a little mistake and I think right away  it's the end of my job. Not good! It's all good, from mistakes you learn they say.... I learned that I won't make that mistake what I made this morning.

Hey! It's getting colder... I think the Winter is starting, such a grey and cold day today. And it will get colder and colder, so I'm not gonna spoil myself with warm winterclothes already, like a winterhat, gloves, a thick scarve. That can wait till it's really cold. Heater is on though! Keep it warm folks!