Floating trough the days...
You can compare this day with yesterday, a bit of the same feelings of 'missing them'. Like people say, sometimes you have good days and sometimes you have bad days. Today I forced myself to do something, and that went okay. I don't like forcing myself, cause it always end up just as how I felt before or maybe worse. What did I do? I stood up at 7:00 am, had a shower and made myself breakfast. A few hours later I jumped on my bike and headed of to Nijverdal. (Woot!) I had the wind in my back, it was a cold wind and it was grey.
While I was driving I thought about going to my Aunt aswell, and not only my Dad. The thing was, my aunt lives more in the east of Nijverdal and my Dad more in the south. So, it was a bit of a round trip, with lots of up-hills. My Aunt was surprised when I came by, "Come on in," she said. While we were sitting down she asked me about the money from Gak, cause there was some misunderstanding (as always wityh Gak). two weeks ago Gak called my Aunt, and they told her that I'm getting twice a paying per month from them.
In the month of January I haven't got any money from Gak, now they are telling me that I have the 'right' to that January money. Gak sent 'that' money to Humanitas, and they told my Aunt that Humanitas has to pay my debt with 'that' money. (The debt from my staying at the summer house) The second paying is for the month February. From what I know was that I only got one paying from the month February, and that was it. I will inform the Humanitas office about this coming Monday. It's all so confusing.
From my Aunt's house I went to my Dad's, and I was already so exhausted, "I won't stay that long." I thought. Dad was alright, he always ask if I got my bicycle back, the one I shipped over from Holland to Canada. I explained him so many times that, that bike is broke now an still is in Canada. But he keeps asking everytime I visit him, I think I should tell you readers what happened with my bicycle. This bicycle came from Holland to Canada with two child seats, one on the front and one on the back.
One day, Ab and I were planning to go for a little ride on my bicycle, and I asked him, "Where do you wanna sit, on the back seat , or on the front seat?" He replied, "Back." And there we went, it was a nice day. Sometimes Ab can't sit still while I ride, he moves then his feet while I'm ridding, I told him to be carefull. Suddenly just before I wanted to stop for the traffic-lights, he went flying of the bicycle! I thought, "What is going on?" Ab and the child seat went flying and landed on the ground, thank god he had his helmet on and the child seat catched the fall.
Ab cried but he didn't had a scratch, thank God! The fall must have been such a shock for him, poor Ab. I'm sure he got his toes between the spakes of the wheel, 8 or 9 spakes were missing. I picked up Ab, and put him on the sidewalk. The poor little fellow, he stopped crying already, but I felt sorry for him. I told him that it's going to be alright, and that he's brave. We decided to go home for some candy. We had to walk cause the bike was to damaged to ride, darn! Things like this can happen, and I'm glad that Ab was okay. Another reason that kids always have to wear helmets while riding there bikes!
Back to my bike ride...
On my way home the wind got stronger, and I had to lay almost flat on my bicycle to not catch the wind. I was exhausted, and decided to make a stop when I saw a little supermarket. I bought a few grocery and took off again. The last few miles were tough but I managed it. I was glad I was back in Almelo. I won't be planning much tonight or tomorrow,I think I deserve some rest. I heard some good news aswell today, one day before I went to Humanitas, I bought Noor a little present for her birthday. I bought her one pair of earrings and one bracelet, plus a little birthday-card.
I put it all in a envelope and send it to her, it would take two weeks to deliver the present in Canada, Barrie. So, I guess I was on time. Today Noor told me she got the present and she was very happy with it. A bit to early, but okay. Better early then late. I was happy aswell when it arrived, I was kinda concerned that it wouldn't. I wanted the gift to be a suprise, but I would have asked a few days before Noor's birthday if she had looked already trough her mail. LOL! It's a nice thing to do, and I liked giving it.
4 comments:
I can imagine how you miss them. When I first moved to Qatar it was my first time being away from my children and it was really hard. I just tried to keep busy and knew that eventually that loneliness would ease. And it has. I still miss them, but I know they live with me in my heart, and sometimes even feel closer to them here through our heartfelt chats and emails than I did when we were all under the same roof.
I hope it gets easier for you Sjon.
Take care,
Lisa
I think it will ease aswell for me, but it takes time. it's still fresh, so now and then I talk to the kids online, and that feels good. I know Saf has it busy, so,she can't be much online, that's alright. I have managed alot the last few months and I will get trough this too, I'm sure that Saf rather wants to see a happy me then a sad me. I thought you were still with your children in Qatar Lisa?
No, but they come to visit. I came to Qatar when my kids were 18 and 20, so they stayed in the States. In many ways it was like I was the one who left home, instead of the kids! lol I think that helped to ease me into how it would be living on my own after being solely responsible for them for 18 years. It's a big adjustment when all you know is having your life center on raising kids, but I have made the transition and now am very happy with my life.
Insha'Allah you will gain that peace, too, Sjon.
Usually it's the kids going to live on there own, must have been different for both of you. I will gain that peace to Lisa, I'm sure. It will take time but eventually... :0) Thanks for the comments!
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