Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween! 

Although it's not that a celebration here, some people here in Holland celebrate it. Specially parents with kids. How different it was when I was in Canada, I had the privilege to celebrate Halloween twice. The first time I was dressed up in a Arabic dress, and the second time I pulled a plastic wagon as a cow, lol. It was fun though, specially to see the kids having the time of their lives. Then afterwards the amount of candy, sigh. Sometimes we had to hide all the candy in our closet, it was way to much to eat it all at once.

What a gorgeous day today, lots of sunshine and not that cold. Perfect Autumn weather, though rain is on his way. Lots of rain actually, yeah, let's not complain, I will wear my rain poncho with a smile. Oh, the last time I wearied it, I think I have to tide my poncho up more. It waved from left to right when I had it on last time when I cycled to work, I looked like superman with his cape. Anyway, rain is on it's way, if I like it or not. I went out today aswell for a little while.... 

Johan, the Buddy project guy, wanted me to go out more with only myself and be happy with that, instead of make it a goal to get more (new) friends. And so I did today, I went out to the garden centre. I had to go there cause I needed a few plants, I had my lunch there aswell. And that was actually my plan to make this a standard, have lunch out every Wednesday. The lunch I had was actually quit expensive, uhm, yeah, what is actually NOT expensive in my eyes, lol! I had a nice large sandwisch and a fresh cup of orange juice. 

It was a nice day off, and I had my rest aswell (Important) Tomorrow could be a important day aswell, I hope I get news from my Boss over my working contract, my half year contract is about to end. Will I get a extension or not? Will I get to hear it tomorrow? Or will they extend the contract automatically? Many questions where I don't have a answer on, am I nervous? Yes, a bit. Life is full of surprises, even with working contracts, lol. I can't find a reason why they won't extend my contract, but still, like I said, life is full of surprises.

Just had a nap.

Just had a nap. 

I had my dinner and waited until I got tired and sleepy but that feeling didn't come. It was still early though, (6:00 pm)  around 8:00 pm I got that tired and sleepy feeling and decided to have a little nap. I slept more then a hour, woohoo! It was 9:30 pm and it was hard to wake up, what to do? To bed or wait till I wake up better. I waited. But I'm sure I won't make it late tonight. I worked hard today, though I worked on another section I had fun. I worked with two other fellow workers and one of them was not to hold, damn he could work. I had to work with him, though I could hold on to my own tempo. But yeah, as the way I am, I try to hold him by with working, cause hey, we work together, right?He was way to fast, so I letted him be. It's not hard work in this section, no heavy lifting and going from here to there. I was standing at a huge table and build mats in any kind of sizes.

Tomorrow's the day off, and I'm looking forward to it. Resting in the morning and probably have a lunch into town, woot! Yeah, my 'new Buddy' (from Buddy project) Johan wanted me to find something to do only for myself, and when I find that something I had to make it a habit or a standard thing. For example, on Wednesday it's a standard I'm doing this or that. I can go to the library and read a book or lend a book, I can go for example out to a friend, just anyone. I can aswell go out for lunch, and that's what I'm gonna do tomorrow. If I like it I will make it a standard. hmm expensive standard, Ah, I will see. No appointments tomorrow, no mail no, nothing. It will be a easy day tomorrow, love it. Nothing heared from my working contract the last two days at work, perhaps Thursday. Thursday it's the 1st of Novemeber, on that date my contract is done and normally it will be extend....or not... eeek!

Short post ahead!

Short post ahead! 

Almost bed time, but first a little writing. I'm cold, but it isn't colder then the last few days. Don't know what it is, I turned up my heater, but I'm still cold. Anyway, early to bed me thinks. Today was a good day for working, though I had here and there muscle pain and felt tired. The weather wasn't a pleasure, last weekend was alot better. It's raining, and more rain is ahead of us this upcoming week. I won't be surprised when we get snow soon aswell, it's all fine with me. Though I have to get used to this coldness.


Work went well too, my second Boss was again sick, his stomach was upset. So I stood alone for a half morning, I was fine but missed my second Boss to confirm the orders. Just before lunch he showed up, yeah he looked sick but 'they' called, cause he was needed. Tomorrow Iwill be working at another section, it's all fine with me. I'm not going to complain, I'm happy that I have work. And that's a good thought. And now off to bed, to find some warmth there. Good night!

Relax, it's Sunday.

Relax, it's Sunday. 

And that's what I did today, relax. It was needed after two hectic days, the cold is still bugging me, though it's getting less. Let's see how it goes tomorrow with work, I know now already that it's gonna be a busy day. Lots to do, my second Boss even wanted to work a few hours extra to get things done. I haven't worked Friday, I needed rest with my cold. Though it turned out a bit different, on Friday in the late afternoon I helped a friend of mine with moving a few couches. And on Saturday I went out for a long forest walk. My nose is still full and my head hurts on and off, I think cause of the thick slime what has to get out. I wish I had a sauna or spa in my house, the steam would have helped. I could steam though with a bucket of hot water and a towel over my head but, I tried that many times before, that's just not my thing. This coming week it will get better

This week I will probably get to hear if my working contract gets a extension aswell, Thursday is that day. Thursday is the day that I work under a contract for 6 months. It was also a contract for 6 months. My thoughts about a extension? I don't know, though I'm not that worried, kinda weird. Maybe later on in the week I will be worried. My thoughts are that I will probably a extension of my contract, but who knows. I can't think of a reason why they would quit with me either, maybe because I only work 3 days a week, and they want someone who want to work a whole week. Further then that, no complains. I'm a good worker, I show alot of enthusiasm, and I'm always there. I will just see what happens, crossing my fingers that it turns out well.

Great afternoon, and not even a nap today!

Great afternoon, and not even a nap today! 

This morning I had annoying headache and felt not so well, I thought, 'here goes my plan for today.'  My plan was to go out in the early afternoon to a forest, to enjoy myself and take some nice 'Autumn' pictures. The forest I would go to is near my Dad's home. But I didn't feel well, but still I wanted to go. And once I want to go I'm really going too. Just a little bit concerned about my headache and sniffy nose I took off after I ated my chicken soup from yesterday, I saved some from last Friday.

I tried a little nap just before going out , but that didn't happen, I was to excited and looking outside and see the sun bursting out of the sky made me wanna leave right away. The trip to the forest wasn't that long, from city Almelo to village Nijverdal is only a small 20 minutes. Though I had to wait for the bus a 15 minutes, not that a great connection. This bus is taking passengers to the next train station, cause Nijverdal is building a huge train tunnel in their village, this building will take one more year.
 

Finally the bus came and brought me and a few other passengers to the next train station, surprisingly it was a free trip, yay! Arrived at the train station it's easy to get to the forest, cross a busy highway, (Thank God for traffic lights) and I'm there. I was prepared for a long walk. And it was a long walk, this forest is huge. You can walk in several directions and come out in several other villages. I took the 'I will walk there where I won't get lost' walk, lol. 

I have been here many times in that forest, ofcource cause I lived here almost all my life. I walked here as a child with my parents and other Family members, such as Cousins and Nieces. As teenager or 20'er I cycled alot here aswell, with my normal bike, my BMX bike or my mountain bike. Many people walk or cycle here, I love this area. It's been quit a while since I been here aswell, so, I really enjoyed this afternoon. 

Here and there the sun disapeared and it looked like rain, but it stayed dry as you can see on the pictures. I walked firm and took breaks aswell, I even made a lunch package, lol. A apple, orange, 2 grain biscuits and a bottle of water, nerdy. After walking a little two hours I got a bit concerned, I got cold and tired, maybe it was a bit to much of a walk for a person who has a cold. But it went good, I had to wait for the bus again, and just before hopping in the train... 

I did my last groceries in Nijverdal. After arriving in my city Almelo, I saw Ina on my way. Ina who lived aswell at Humanitas and is a female buddy of mine, lol. We visit each other quiet often, she offered me a coffee. With here and there a few doubts (it was almost dinner time) I went with her, it was a nice chat with Ina. I should do that more often, no worries of arriving late at home, cause I have all the time in my life.

A wise lesson...

A wise lesson... 

My visit from my new 'buddy' from Buddy contact was short, and he was late aswell. Though it was a good visit, he (Johan) wanted to know what my week and weekends off looks like, or, how do I fill my week and weekends. Johan wanted to know for example what time I get up and what time I go to bed, and what do I do to fill the days. Well, this is what I told him, (long version) let's start with Monday...

Monday I always get up early, even though I putted my alarm on 5:00, I always automatically wake up at 4:15 or even sooner. It's easy to turn around and sleep another hour before I get up for work, but no, if I would try I won't be able to sleep. So, I get up way to early actually at  4:15 or 4:30 and grab slowly my laptop. It's such a nice way to wake up. Some people might grab the newspaper or perhaps a book, I grab my laptop. 

Time flies when your on the net, watching the latest updates from friends on Facebook, read the news and weather forecast. Before I know it it's 6:15 and then it's time to get started to take my medication and prepair breakfast, after my breakfast I do a quick wash up and put my working gear on and grab my jacket and I'm off at 7:00. The ride to work is only a short 20 minutes, I like being on time. Have a little chat in the cantine before I work. 

4:30 and the work is done, I cycle home with another fellow worker who lives near. I won't have much time to have a wash up and get clean clothes on, before I go to the 6 'o' clock dinner. 4;45 I'm home, do a quick Facebook look, a quick wash up and clean clothes on and a quick lunch making for tomorrow's work. 5:30 and I'm off for the free dinner. At 7:00 I cycle back home with my full belly. Around 10:00/10:30 I will be in bed. 

Tuesday is almost the same as Monday, accept there isn't a free dinner. So, nothing quick and fast then. I take my time and don't even have to prepair dinner, I already had made that last Sunday. I always prepair a huge dinner on Sunday, one for Sunday itself and one for Tuesday. I don't like it that much if I have to make dinner after work, just to tired and exhausted then from work. I can go a bit later to bed on Tuesday's, lol, cause I have the day off Wednesday. Though I won't make it to 12:00, cause I will be sleeping then. 

Wednesday is a resting day, though I have plenty of time, this day always flies by. Sleeping out? Hmm, yes and no, I'm always early up. Around 7:00 or even before I will be up doing not much, laptop and naps in the morning. Though there could be that I have appointments then, or that I have to go somewhere because of a mail that hasn't been sorten out. At 4:00 pm I usually take of towards  the free dinner, perhaps a little grocery shopping before. The free dinner is at 5:00. I return when my belly is full, mostly around 5:45 pm.

Early night on Wednesday cause work is calling again on Thursday. Same time to bed as Monday's and Sunday's, around 10:10:30. Thursday you can compare with Monday, only the free dinner will be happening right after my work. I cycle from my work right away towards the free dinner, stopping with work at 4:30, the free dinner starts at 5:00. After the free dinner I will be exhausted and ready for my 3 days off. Relaxing evening ahead.

Friday is a grocery day, and aswell a resting day. I might aswell make plans for the upcoming day then, Saturday is perfect for going out, or not. The 3 days off are mostly okay days, trying to filling them, might be going a day out aswell, or visit my Dad. Or even stay at home and do another second round of my grocery list. Sunday is a easy going and relax day, resting, napping, cooking, a nice day to stay at home, resting for the upcoming working day on Monday.

Johan, my new buddy said that I had long days sometimes, for example Tuesday I will be up at 4:15 am and go to bed around 11:00 or 11:30. That's almost more then 19 hours being up, no wonder I'm tired on my days off, Johan told me to try to get out of bit later, later then 4:15. "Up at 6:00 am is much easier for you," he told me, "You will be perfectly on time still." I'm going to try this next week, trying to sleep one hour more. Johan told me another wise thing, he noticed that I was searching for new friends to overwhelming...

In that way I will never find a friend. It was better not to make it a goal to find new friends, it was better to have a 'I'm really okay and fine when I'm going out on my own' feeling. And that's right, I like going out, even on my own. Though I mostly say to myself, "Hey, it would be nice now to have someone with me now I'm out." Johan gave me a few cores to do for up coming days and next week, he wanted me to find something to do on my days off. "You are going to learn first that it's really okay and that you can have a good time... 

...when your out or do something," Johan told me. I'm actually looking forward to find something to do, I'm not gonna search for people, I'm gonna search for something to do, something that will enjoy me. I'm starting tomorrow, I will write about it what it was. This Friday has been okay, I'm still having that cold but I went out anyway for a bit. A friend of mine offered me to come with her to a second hand store. First she had to pick up a couch on her way. 

It took a while when she arrived at my house, she had someone with her too, I know both of them from Humanitas and the free dinner. It was a bit of a hectic and not that nice out, they were both smoking in the car with the window half open. The cold wind blew many times on my face, not that healthy with my cold me thought, lol. It was a hectic out with many lifting and moving furniture and many cold wind on my face. (Shut the window!!, lol) One friend bought 2 new chairs that had to go to her house, plus the new couch she bought. 

The other friend took over the old couch from the other friend, and that couch had to go to her home. I was late with doing my groceries aswell, not really what I had on my mind with going out with a friend. But oh well, next time it will be better, with me not having a cold and then it will be me with only 'that' one friend...

What on earth was I thinking... rest your body, silly!

What on earth was I thinking... rest your body, silly! 

Even though the cold I have work went pretty well today, managed to do alot and was even thinking of working tomorrow asswell a half day. Yeah right, not. My second Boss came towards me just before closing time and asked me if I could work a half day or not. It was really okay if I decided not to work. I told him that I still feel that cold I have and that I need my rest now. He understood, but oh, the tempting to work tomorrow a half day. We are busy at work, many orders to finish, small and big ones. When I got home from work and the free dinner I felt exhausted and satisfied.

I thought, I will see tomorrow and decide what to do, work or not work. But after my little nap around 8:00 pm,( I felt sleepy, and took a nap) I felt even more sleepier and exhausted. Better not to work tomorrow and rest my body these coming three days, sicken out my cold. Tomorrow with groceries I will buy just a bit more fruit as usual, chicken soup is what I'm thinking aswell. Tomorrow I will have two visitors, my new 'buddy' from Buddy contact and the Boss from Buddy contact. It's the second time they both visit me. 

The first visit was a 'get to know each other' visit. Tomorrow visit will be a first try to get to me started with finding new social contacts, it's about time. My new 'Buddy' will help me with achieving that, think of, joining a club, light volunteers work, etc, etc. I have actually no idea how 'we' get started, but I will surely find out tomorrow. Cold night tonight, only 3 degrees. I putted a thicker blanket on just now. Yeah, I'm glad I decided to get my rest the coming 3 days. It's needed.

Lazy, lazy day!

Lazy, lazy day! 

Resting day like it has to be and always should be, lol. I really didn't do much today, I had no appointments, no visitors, no nothing. I'm, still feeling that cold I have recently, I'mnot concerned, it takes time. I take my fruit , tea and paracetamols. In the afternoon I went to the free dinner, that was nice. They served kale mashed potato today, tasted good and it was the right weather for it. Today's weather was grey and a cooler, aswell it seemed there was fog in the air. Later in the week it will get colder. 

Pictures taken last weekend, when I went to my Dad, it's not the Autumn colors I want to see yet. The leafs are still greenis/yellow.

Clear blue sky is always nice to look at.

I have nothing planned yet for the weekend, but I'm thinking of going to my Dad's village, Nijverdal. Not to visit my Dad but go to the forest there, this forest is huge! I want to take some pictures there, cause I think it will be snowing soon, they forspelled it already. It's easy to get in the forest actually, I only have to take one train station further. I will cross the street and 'hop' there I am in the middle of the forest. 

Pictures taken today, leafs are finally falling.

Leafs!!

Let's see what my cold does the coming days, after the free dinner I was tired and felt sleepy alot, even after two naps today.  Early to bed tonight and tomorrow work, I hope I don't have to work a extra half day on Friday. I need my rest too.

I feel a little cold coming up...

I feel a little cold coming up...

I think it's the weather, yesterday we had 20 degrees above zero, last week it was a bit cool weather, and in the end of the week we might have perhaps snow. The drgrees are going down, Though in the middle of October we had some frost aswell. Crazy weather, no wonder people get sick. The leaves are falling like mad aswell, lovely colors everywehere. I need to get a day out or a afternoon to take some nice pictures. Before I know everything will be covered in snow.

Today's work went well, again on another section. Though I'm not complaining, it was nice working there, different and nice. On my own section I lift alort, on today's section not much. I worked hard these two days, it was all good. Tomorrow a day off, it's nice to have a resting day. Nothing planned, no appointments, nothing. Love it. Nothing else to report people, only that I have a sniffy nose, cause of the cold. Might get some nose spray tomorrow...

"Stop worrying!"

"Stop worrying!" 

For me sometimes worrying (read: always) seems necessary, when I worry about something it mostly always turn out well. Though worrying alot isn't healthy, and it's surely not a nice feeling. I worried yesterday about my trip to Copenhagen, it seemed  I was to late with the paying. I thought I had to pay four weeks before the trip date, though it was six weeks. I received a letter from the travel company last week with them telling me that I still had to pay for the trip, they would like that I payed within five days, or there would be a chance that the trip would bel canceled. Though I opened the letter yesterday and not last week, I was late yes, I panicked and payed the trip right away online, hoping afterwards that this trip wouldn't be canceled. In my eyes I was way to late with paying, the five days were already past...

This morning I looked on the calendar and started counting the weeks from the day that I payed for the trip until the date of the trip (29th of December) I counted six weeks and a few days, so, I was good. Though I worried cause of the received letter saying 'paying within five days,' this morning I called the travel company at work. I Asked them if my paying is confirmed, and if my trip is canceled. Well the paying is confirmed, and the trip isn't canceled. When I got back from work I even got a answer on the email I sent yesterday, the booking was complete, paying is done, I will receive in a few days the official confirming. Yay, now stop worrying! I think I will start worrying now for next week, lol. Next week I will probably get to hear if I can stay working for another half year, in other words, a extension of my working contract.

Fellow workers told me that the Boss would have given you a hint already the last day or weeks if the contract would not be extended. Hmm, I don't know, this company is aswell full of surprises I noticed. Though I can't find any reason why they won't hire me for another half year, maybe only that I can work only 3 days, they probably want someone who can work for 5 days. Further then that it's all positive with me, I do my best, never been sick, work extremely well, I have been flexible, can copy very well with the other workers, etc, etc. I should actually not even worry, though I do, it goes automatically, ans I guess it's normal aswell. So yeah, it's fine, let me worry, lol. Maybe then it will be fine. Oh, and today's work? That went very well, I did alot, I managed to finish more then I actually expected, was well happy with that. A bit sore muscles and a bit tired afterwards but oh so satisfied!

Canceled?

Canceled? 

My trip to Copenhagen with New Years is probably canceled, because I had to pay this trip at least six weeks before the actual trip date. And I thought it was four weeks! When I confirmed this trip back in June I even putted a note on my calendar saying, 'Pay trip to Copenhagen,' a month before the trip. I got a letter from the travel company telling me I still had to pay for this trip, they wanted me to pay within five days, if not then the trip will be canceled.  I usually wait until I open my mailbox, wrong, I know! I'm to stressed sometimes to open it, "It can wait," I think then. Well, this time it couldn't wait. The travel company sent the letter on the 9th of October, and probably I received it last week, maybe Wednesday, Thursday or Friday, or even Saturday. If I had checked my mail sooner, I would have been on time with my trip paying, (I think) 

And now? Well, I payed right away in the early morning online. (Always paying online) Though I thought about it, shall I pay or not? I did, and I sent the travel company a email telling them what happened, told them sorry, and that I had paid this morning. The company is closed on Sunday's, tomorrow from 8:00am until 10:00pm there open. I will call them right away tomorrow at work, I want answers, lol. I will be jumping for you if the trip is not canceled! If it's been canceled, then I will see what I do, going on a trip or not. Canceled means aswell I have to pay 75% of the confirmed trip, sigh! I will loose most of my money, and then to book another trip? I do not know. Perhaps a cheap New Years or Christmas trip somewhere in Holland. I will see. I am keeping my fingers crossed for tomorrow. Roll on Monday!

Just a Saturday.

Just a Saturday. 

Today was visiting Dad on my schedule, I went there in the late morning around 11:00. It was still pretty warm outside, unusual warm for this time of year. I switched my winter coat for a thinner one, it surely was needed. Before I took of I had a nap, and decided to have one more after Dad's visit. The visit was quit alright, I bought Dad the sippy cup, two new comfy pants and flowers. He was happy with my visit and my Aunt wasn't there, though I always check the parking lot for my Uncle's car, lol. So much better when my Aunt's not around.

After the visit I took my second nap, and then a early dinner preparing. I had plans to go out this evening but that didn't go trough. I had a coffee 'date' with one of my friends, but she went out with her Son to a football match. It would have been just a visit to a friend, chatting and drink a few coffee's, that's all. But okay, perhaps next time. Today I have been thinking of my time in Canada a few times, don't know why. Do I think alot of that time lately? No, not much, I mean surely not that much as back in the beginning of 2011.

Thinking about it today made me miss my time in Canada, just being there and do the things I did there. Shopping with Saf or just the kids, walking or cycling to the park with the two young ones, the talks, the singing, the jokes, etc, etc. Although the break up and although the 'getting used to everything,' I surely had as great time too. The loving and attention was surely worth while, but I'm here now and that is good too. If I could do it all over again, I would have done it much different, better, much better. Kinda cliche to say, but it's true though. 

I learned alot being in a first time relationship, aswell being a father, oh yes! I have been put trough a test by God, I guess, haha!  Do I wish I could do it all over again? Hmm, I don't know, if that means I have to sell everything here and give up everything here again, then it's a no! But if I could go back in time, to let's say 2009 March being on my way to Saf, yeah, then it's a yes! I never will regret my time in Canada, I had a great time there, and yes aswell though times to get used to things, it surely was a hard lesson to learn. It was a great adventure, only wish I could have stayed longer.

I have become stronger, wiser, and I'm good here. Though I wanna go back one more time, back to Mississauga on a little vacation. Meet friends, see the area, I wonder what that will do to me, it will bring back alot of memories for sure if I would go now, so I will wait a few years, whenever I'm ready. Visiting Sad aswell? No, that will bring alot of memories back, ans seeing the kids, hmm, I'm not ready for that, and I don't think I will ever be. Yeah I miss them when I wrote this post.

Almost a full weekend...

Almost a full weekend... 

Yawning alot this evening, soon I will go to bed. I worked a half day in the afternoon, and I took my rest in the morning. Just before lunch I bought quick most of my groceries for the upcoming week. Though it's been quit a full day, I'm quit tired now and ready for bed. It's been extraordinary warm aswell today, more then 20 degrees and lots of sunshine, were almost in November! The weekend will be the same, nice temperature and sunshine, I'm not complaining. 

Tomorrow I will be heading of to Dad, it's been 3 weeks since I last saw him, so yeah, it's time. The comfy pants I bought him 3 weeks ago fitted him well, he was happy with it. Dad's nurse asked me to buy one more for him, ofcource I will, I like doing things for my Dad specially when I live not near him. Dad needs a new mug aswell, he needs one with a, uhm, how you say that in English? It's actually a mug like babies have, a sippy mug. Dad doesn't have that much strength anymore in his hands or legs. 

Kinda sad to see him like that though, he used to be such a hard worker, and now on his old age.... I will buy some new flowers aswell, he likes that. Kinda weird that I didn't hear from my Aunt lately, she use to call daily or weekly, but since that 'argue' she called much more less. Last time she called was 3 weeks ago, thumbs up, I'm pretty fine with it. It saves me alot of nerves and stress for sure.

I will be going to my Dad late in the morning, fist I wanna sleep in, it's needed. Probably I will visit a friend aswell Saturday eve,' I promised her a few times but I refused a few times. I know her from the free dinners, and from mutual friends from Humanitas. I like it to have (new) friends, though I'm pretty aware of what kinda people I choose as friends, I always keep an eye open, specially people from Humanitas. (Most of them you can't trust)

It ofcource takes time to get to know people, the person where I'm going to tomorrow seems nice and fun to be around, so far so good. Though I should keep more distance aswell, I noticed from myself that I get to much carried away when it comes to socializing, I don't have to see everyone who gives me attention as a friend. I noticed that I'm in need of some good friends, in 'that' I get a bit to much carried away sometimes. And that can be not always good.

Exhausted after work...

Exhausted after work... 

After a day of rest I went to work this morning, I was quit on time on my way, so, no hasting this time. At work there was enough to do, my second Boss was still feeling ill but was present. I could tell he was ill by the way he looked and the way he acted, he was quiet and took it easy. I worked normal like I always do, steady on but aswell easy. It was warm outside, and I could feel that too inside the factory, even worse while working. I felt a bit short breathed, that wasn't a nice feeling when you have to lift many times. Though in the afternoon when the lifting was almost done I felt a bit better, I slightly had the same feeling last night. It started with cramps in my stomach... weird! It can be anything, perhaps hidden nerves, lol. With such feelings I always take it easy or slow down my work a bit. The lunch break at 12:30 came right on time, I nearly finished the heavy lifting. 

The break was needed, oh yes! Though I finished what I wanted to finish, nice feeling. Health goes first, I know, but sometimes my little pains are just little nerves, nerves mostly attacks the weakest parts of my body. Remember my hurting thumb? I was thinking the worst, but in the end I just think I pulled a little muscle, cause the pain is gone now. Though I always keep an eye open, cause it doesn't always have to be little nerves what's causing the pain. Tomorrow I will work too, but only a half day, I surely couldn't do another whole day. Busy days ahead, Saturday visiting my Dad, in the evening probably a coffee at a friends house. Groceries have to be bought aswell, and ofcource the needed rest has to be planned aswell. Thinking of making a little schedule. It will make things alot easier, plan things, write the cords down and separate them on the days off. Easy!

"Buddy wanted."

"Buddy wanted."

Today was the day my new counselor visited me for the first time, though it's not a usual counselor, this counselor will help me with finding new social contacts or help me to find a sport or a club, I need something to do, specially in the weekend. I need new contacts, people where I can go out with perhaps, or just visit so now and then. And who knows maybe become friends. But the 'friends' thing is not the most important, finding new contacts is.

I was a bit nervous and at the same time excited. I shouldn't be nervous, lol, this is just going to be fun. The new counselor and his Boss (The lady who leads the project 'Buddy wanted.') came right on time, 2:00 pm. The lady was friendly and the new counselor was a tiny bit nervous I saw, they both shook my hand and sat down. My new counselor looks a bit hmm, uhm, scary? Can I say that? When we all talked about ourselves the 'scary' feeling vanished slowly away...

Took some pictures at a little park, then I saw this black swan with the two young swans...

 I could not get closer, otherwise the male swan would attack me for sure. 

He has a bit of a weird 'tick,' when he starts to speak he closes his eyes for 5 or 6 seconds and then looks at me or who he's talking to. My new counselor's name is Johan, so I will say Johan when I write about my new counselor, it's alot easier to type aswell, lol. I have a good feeling about him, I think it will be good. Johan asked me what he actually wants from him, I told him that I would like that we both/together are going to look for something where I can get (perhaps) social contacts, that can be a sport, a club, volunteers work, etc, etc. 

Johan wanted to know this cause then he knows what he has to do. Friday the 26th of October Johan will come and then we start the whole 'finding social contacts' project. This project will last for 8 months, wow! And it's all free, this project is sponsored by Humanitas. Humanitas offered me this project before, but I rejected it, I thought I could do this easy on my own, yeah, not. I tried hard but without success. Cheers on the upcoming 8 months!

732th post!

732th post! 

One day I'm gonna hit the 1000th post, oh my, oh my. Just that sometimes I I think, 'What on earth am I thinking to write every day a post.' Sometimes I think I write to much of my personal life aswell, like, why should I write about my financial problems? Or, why should I write about what I did the whole day? Though it's fun to read it back sometimes, it's not always fun to write, everyday writing a post is sometimes quit a job. Sometimes I don't even feel to write, but then again, I can't skip a post anymore. I wrote already 731 posts, lol. If I would skip a day then it would feel awkward, or not right.

Today I was a  bit nervous before going to work, cause yesterday I worked on my own section with another fellow worker, my second Boss was sick. This morning I thought that he might be feeling well again and come to work, but where would I be placed then? On the schedule (at work) it said I'm placed on another section, but I rather work at my own section. Maybe I could have switched with the other fellow worker, but no. It's pretty busy at our section, but the other section needed another worker aswell. (me) Arrived at work my second Boss was still sick, so I thought I would be placed on my own section, but no. 

The other fellow worker where I worked with yesterday worked alone in my own section. And my second Boss showed up in the early afternoon, he wanted to try to work again, with success. I worked at the other section, it's nice working there but I rather work at my own comfy section. I'm good there, I feel great there, I want to learn more there and grow. I know I can grow more there, I have it in me, I'm doing already such a good job there. That gives a awesome feeling, like, I want more and more. And then they sent me to another section sometimes, ugh! Thursday I will be on my own section again, says the schedule, but first a day rest.

The hearing was short...

The hearing was short... 

What a full day it was, my second Boss was again sick. Surprised cause last Friday he was there, only the day before he was sick. What's going on? Probably he will be back tomorrow, I will see. The working day without my second Boss was good though, just like usual when he's not there. I'm fine without him, though I miss him saying that missing word when I finish a mat or when I'm not that really sure about the lenght or wide from a mat. When I'm sure that the mat is done, I want to be sure that the mat is really, really  done, then my second Boss will say if it's done or not, I miss that. But further I'm fine.

One fellow worker helped me out today, that went, okay. When I have to work alone I automatically make a little program in my head how I go to work the following hours, when someone is going to help me it would be nice for me to (if he wants) follow my program aswell. I'm not that good in giving orders to someone who has worked longer then me here in this factory, lol. But today went well as I said, we both did alot. After my working day I made a quick dinner, I warmed up tomato soup and finished it with some crackers, yum! Then clean clothes on and on my way to the city hall for the hearing.

I wasn't nervous, the last few days after that I heared that I have a hearing I became calmer and calmer. I thought, 'I will let it all come over me, their not gonna kill me, lol' Arrived there I had to sit down and wait for someone who's gonna pick me up, I was a bit to much on time. I was friendly and calm. A man came and brought me to a little hall where five people had gathered around a table, wow that felt a bit awkward. I felt like I was a criminal and that I had murdered or robbed someone, lol. Ofcource it felt weird, it was my first hearing. The hearing was short, very short, it only take 15 minutes. 

I had to say what my 'objection'was one more time, that went well, I spoke clearly and loud. That gave a good feeling, There was a woman from Social Services aswell, she did her saying aswell. One thing what I didn't quit understood or where I didn't actually agreed with was that she told the 'jury' that I called on the last week from May that I had a payed job now, cause I never called, and I was clearly on time, like social services anounced in the mail. But oh well. I will see what the outcome is, I will have to wait 6 days the jury told me. If I noy have to pay back the amount of money I will be happy, if I have to pay then it's understandable aswell.

A hearing tomorrow...

A hearing tomorrow...

... And I'm not looking forward to it, it kinda worries me aswell. The hearing in short is about a payment that I have to pay back to Social Services. On the 1st of May Social Services had to stop paying me monthly cause I had a payed job, but they were a month to late. That was not my mistake, but their mistake. I had the option to do a 'objection,' I had to fill in a paper with the reason why I objected, why I was against the paying back. First I had doubts about the whole 'objection' thing, but someone from Social Services almost insisted.

I filled in the paper, and the government plus Social Services looked trough the papers and they sent me the papers with the appointment for the hearing, that's a normal procedure. So, tomorrow evening at 6:00 pm I will be at the City Hall for the hearing, the hearing will only take 20 minutes. After the hearing I will have to wait 12 weeks for the results, lol. In the meanwhile the 'paying back' still remains, though I haven't heard from them yet, no letter, no mail, no information of how to pay back.

Things like that makes me nervous and kinda worried, if I think about it I worry about more things, for example my job, 'can I stay at my job after 1 November?' My half year contract will be over after 1 November I hope I will get a extension, I can't think of a reason why not, but still, the worries. Anyway, first the hearing tomorrow, chances of winning the hearing? Hmm, naah, it's there word against mine. Let's face it, they payed me to much money, (their fault) I will have to pay that back. Sounds normal, right? We'll see.

A okay day!

A okay day! 

The lonely feeling from yesterday slowly disappeared this morning, I had plans today. Today I went to Ikea, it was actually needed, cause I needed something for my window sill. Plants have died again in the fully sun on my sill, for the second time. So, no more plants on my sill. A friend of mine offered me to join me to Ikea, she offered me already last week. But she went sick just a few days before our trip, and today she didn't feel any better. I went alone, I was actually looking forward to go to Ikea with someone, it's so much more fun. But okay, with a slightly disappointed face I took off. This friend I know from the free dinners, she's actually a friend of someone I know from Humanitas, she's nice, and has two kids.

Off I went, I bought my last groceries already just before I took off to the train station towards Ikea. It wasn't cold and the expected rain didn't show up. The trip with the train wasn't that long either, not even 15 minutes. Arrived in Hengelo (the City where Ikea is placed) I took the bus to Ikea. But I forgot to have any change on me, 3 Euro and 30 Euro cents was pretty much for a 10 minutes bus drive, sigh. The bus driver told me to go to the nearest bank and try to get a bank machine, there was one near the bus station. I still had 3 minutes before the bus left. I ran to the nearest bank and putted my card into the bank machine, but it didn't work, the second attempt neither. 

I ran back to the bus and told the bus driver that I will take the second bus, I needed to find another bank machine for change.  The bus took off and I went searching, after a few machines I found one what actually worked, sigh! I walked back to the bus stop and waited for the second bus, Bus 51 to Ikea showed up within 10 minutes, good! I thought to myself, why should I stress about the time, I got plenty of time on my own, enjoy!! I don't have to be back on a certain time, right? It's a Saturday afternoon and it was busy at Ikea, but that was okay, I took my time and enjoyed myself. Ikea is nice to visit, it's cheap aswell, and just watching the items they sell is nice aswell. 

I bought a few things I needed,  I saw a few things where I thought, 'Shall I? Or shall I not?" I saw a nice painting but had doubts of buying it, it was pretty big aswell. Then the cooking pan I saw, hmm, it was not actually what I'm here fore, lol. I bought a few fake plants, two little lamps and a few vases. I was satisfied, it was all good. Even though I had to carry it all what I bought, it was good to do. I packed it all in a few plastic bags, and packed it then all together in one big plastic bag, I'm pretty good in that, lol. I had a nice afternoon, I took the bus and train towards home, I thought the 3 Euro and 30 Euro cents was a one way, but it was not, just my luck. I prepaired dinner when I got home and took my rest. The things I bought looks nice in the window sill, I will place pictures from it in the next post.

P.s. the friend who wanted to join me to Ikea told me that she will make up with me, the nicer days are coming (Autumn, Christmas, New Year) she wants me to join her with her Family to go out a day or perhaps a dinner. Sounds good!

That lonely feeling...

That lonely feeling...

The three days off in the weekend can have many different sides, sometimes I feel like I want to do just nothing and I'm pretty fine with it, sometimes I want to go out and I'm feeling pretty excited about it. But sometimes that lonely feeling during these days can hit me aswell, today was a day like that. I didn't do much today, I felt a bit left out and I don't know why. Sometimes a uplifting word or a talk from a friend can get me going again, though nothing has changed in the situation where I'm in, I'm still alone. Most of the time I'm good and fine with that, but just that sometimes.... ugh! 

It rained pretty hard when I went to the dentist this morning, kinda nerves I cycled trough the rain. Though it was just a check up. The female dentist I have is a very nice lady, she treats me well during her job, no pain. The check up went good, there was nothing broke, everything was okay. Yeah, I don't have the perfect teeth but the fillings were all good, and there was no hole to find. I told her that I bought a electric toot brush a month ago, that was a plus point. Wish I bought that much earlier. My teeth were clean the dentist told me, (insert smile) it's all good! My next dentist check up will be next year.

Now, the mail what I waited for so long has finally arrived, social services wants me to pay a sum of money back what I received back in May. On May 1st I signed my working contract at work, in that same week I went to social services to tell them that I have a job now. They gave me a form (paper) where I had to fill in where I work and when I started working there and what I earn, etc, etc. I filled in the form and sent it to social services. A month later I received a mail back from social services telling me that I have to pay back a sum of money from the month May from this year.

Since I signed my working contract I'm not receiving any monthly money anymore from social services, that normal cause if they would pay me monthly I would earn above the minum wage. I was nicely on time with me informing them about my new job. But, social services weren't able to look trough my 'informing' on time, and getting it 'done' one time. And because of  that I will have to pay back my monthly money from the month May. Just because 'they' weren't getting it done on time. Now, social services advised me to do a 'objection,' I can't find the right English word for it. A 'objection' gives me the opportunity to prove that social services were wrong or actually 'not on time.' 

And because of that I have to pay a month loan back. I did the 'objection,' I had to write a letter with a story why I want to make a 'objection' and why I'm against the paying back . So, I wrote the letter and waited for a message back from social services. A mail came back today with social services saying that they received the letter and that there will be a 'hearing,' sigh. What did I start?! Though it will be a small 'hearing.' I'm surely not looking forward to it, lots of reasons, reason one, I'm nervous cause I'm not a speaker, and reason two, in my eyes the whole 'hearing' won't help, Ill have to pay anyway. 

I know that are not positive thoughts, but okay. Upcoming Monday is the 'hearing' at 6:00 pm, I can bring someone with me to support me, but I don't have a clue who. I will be fine on my own. I'm expecting a no, but hey in the same way I will have a yes, a yes, I don't have to pay the monthly money back. Oh my I will be in court! Haha, it sounds so weird, but it's actually not that big. Hope I will get a yes.

Sleepy!

Sleepy!

This won't be a long post, I'm feeling sleepy. I already fell asleep while being on Facebook. It's been along day working on my own in the section where I always work. My second Boss was elsewhere today, he gave me a few orders trough Facebook last night, so I knew what to do first today. Today went well, I finished the orders nearly what had to be done this Thursday. The working alone felt good, I love showing that I can do it. Almost a year ago I came working in this factory for the first time, for a test period for 3 months. Well, it became actually 6 months. And look at me now, I know what to do, I know how to handle things, etc, etc. 

I learned many things during the 6 months, I enjoyed it and still do. I finished a huge mat what came in two parts, and almost finished a order of 100 little mats. Tomorrow I'm off (as usual) tomorrow my second Boss will finnish the order of 100 mats. Today he told me he was proud of me on the Facebook chat. Kinda awkward to have 'a Boss' as a friend on Facebook, lol. But he's a cool guy and I see him as just as one of the fellow workers, only he gives the orders, tells me what to do, he knows what goes first and what goes last. Tomorrow I will have my rest, like I said it's been a long day today. For now I will say, good night!

"At your service!"

"At your service!" 

I love getting advice and orders trough my Facebook chat from my fellow workers, LOL! Naah, just kidding, one fellow worker, (my second Boss) told me what to do first when I start with my work tomorrow, cause he won't be there. I knew this already cause he told me last Tuesday. It's the first time ever he messaged me trough Facebook, or any kind of network. It's sometimes crazy at work, today my second Boss worked alone and tried to do as many as possible. Otherwise we will have a delay on our orders this week. Tomorrow I will take it over from him, cause he has to go for a appointment. Usually we work together. 

Two pictures I took this afternoon, the tree's are still green. But soon they will change color. Higlander cattle's you see in the picture, so pretty!

Tomorrow I will be on my own, just like last week, then I also had a day 'on my own.' Maybe it's weird but... I love it!! I'm NOT complaining! I don't know what it is, and I can't explain it, I just love this work so much, I think I never had work that I love so much as this. Hmm, maybe the wooden furniture I made at my last job, but this job I have now is different. I can call this a 'real' job, I earn money with it, the fellow workers are hard workers and kind. It feels like I'm working in a real factory, I love the work I do, I never complained about the amount of work. Lol, I jump for joy when we almost drown in new orders. Am I ill!?

Busy, busier, busiest!

Busy, busier, busiest! 

It's busy at work, we sure need more workers. But the Boss doesn't wanna hear it it seems, pity. Today I had to leave my section to work on another section, though I was on both sections needed. If I had to choose I would have chosen my own section ofcource, I know how it goes there, I know what to do, what goes first and last. It will even get busier in the end of the week at our section, but today I was some where else. The work there is a bit lighter, and just okay. It was fun working with the other worker, nice guy. I always try to do my best and alot, I like it, it gives me a good feeling.

The guy where I worked with said aswell that we need more workers, the guy is usually alone making the mats, that's almost impossible, but he has too. Today he needed one worker more, me! Work went well today, even with my thumb, I really can't explain where the pain came from or why it happened. I'm just relieved that the pain is gone, though I will keep a eye open for my thumb. No Doctor's appointment this week. Thursday I will be on my own section again, alone! I feel that boosting' feeling again, that 'dare me' feeling, lol. It's busy, and I want to help out, though I keep a eye on my health ofcource, always.

It's cold!

It's cold! 

It's cold out, the temperature today was so so. Almost freezing in the morning but the sun shined and warmed up the day, though I'm thinking of putting a Winter coat on tomorrow. And maybe even my long john's, lol. When I got back from work, the Autumn coat I had on felt cold, but I refused the put on a thicker coat, it's only October, what to wear when it's really freezing!? When I got back from the 'free dinner' I was even colder, I putted on a warm sweater and the heater a degree higher. Plus warm socks and a cuppa tea, that made me warm, nice! I think it will be Winter soon,  Autumn will be short. Winter will be rough, I tell ya!

Work went well today, all the nerves before this day were vanished, and surprisingly the pain in my thumb was less. So weird, I woke up this morning and the pain was almost gone. There were moments I could feel a bit of pain in my thumb, but that was almost nothing. Still I might see my Doctor on Wednesday, just to be sure. The fellow workers told me aswell that it's common here with other workers, many have the same problem, hurting hands and fingers. We do make sometimes the same movements while working, though we have lots of different work aswell. But it's the long and same movements after another.

I will go to bed early I think, although the heater is on, I'm still a bit chilly. A thicker blanket I have putted on the bed, let's see if that warms me up tonight. Night ya'll!

Osteoarthritis?

Osteoarthritis?

Not in a pleasant mood today, still the thumb is bugging me, I wish I knew what it is. Ofcource I try not search on the internet for symptoms but the trying failed. The pain and symptoms in my thumbs might be osteoarthritis, it's actually quit oblivious. When I wake up the pain is on his worst when I use my thumb, starting stiffness, later on the pain slowly goes away when I do activities, but comes back in the evening. The most pain is on the top of my thumb, when I push there the pain floats trough my whole thumb. The last three days I have been resting, aswell the hurting thumb has rest then. Though the rest brings aswell stiffness, pain. It worries me, and worrying makes the pain ofcource worse. 

This morning I felt bad, I worried alot cause of my thumb. Bad scenarios came up, 'maybe I need a operation, can I still do my work? Do I have to give up work? Will I be handicapped with this thumb?' I know I shouldn't think this way................But I do. Sometimes when the pain goes away, I feel a relief, and just think, "I will just see what happens this week." Maybe it's not even Osteoarthritis, maybe I just pulled a muscle, or, I don't know. What I do know is that I have to see my Doctor this week. Tomorrow with work I will see if I can handle the work, if I can't I will be off. And go straight to my Doctor. If I can handle the work then I will wait until Wednesday (day off) to see my Doctor.

Autumn sun!

Autumn sun!

A nice Saturday, it just felt a bit different then other Saturdays. Feeling not so well puts me in a 'blah' mood. Still the thumb is hurting me, I went to a few pharmacy's to look for.... yeah, for what actually. Bandage, a cold compress, or perhaps cream for the hurting thumb. Cold feels good on the thumb, but I'm not a Doctor, so I don't really know what's good or right. I didn't succeed with the first two pharmacy's but the last pharmacy gave me some advice, I explained what was wrong with my thumb and where the pain was. I could tape my thumb to give it a rest, said the lady from the pharmacy.So, yeah, I bough the bandage/tape and tried it on my thumb. It gives a stiff feeling, I don't know if it's gonna help, I will see. I also still have some painkillers from Ibuprofen 600mg, I'm not really a medicine taker, so I will be carefull with those 600mg. 

Maybe I will take one 600mg on Monday and Tuesday one,while at work, but first I will see how the thumb feels on Monday. If the pain still continues on Wednesday I will see my Doctor. So much rain this morning, I was thinking this rain will last the whole day. But the sunshine apeared when I went out to do the rest of my groceries, Sjon-shine! After my groceries and the pharmacy's I took of to the garden centre, I need new decoration infront of my livingroom main window. Plants are dying infront of that window cause of the full sun. I looked for fake plants, tiny little lamps 0r candeliers with candles...But after a few hours shopping I still had nothing. I decided to leave and give it a rest. I will look next weekend or perhaps this coming week, Ikea or another store I will see. I think it will be Ikea. No, wait, it will be Ikea, it's been a while since I have been there.

Stormy weather!

Stormy weather! 

The wind blew hard today, but it wasn't that cold, though they forspelled it. Nothing changes more then the weather, lol. It was a bit a bleh day today, I rested well in the morning, took a nice nap. The rain was streaminmg down this morning, lucky it was dry in the afternoon. I needed some groceries, otherwise I won't had something to eat for dinner. I went to the closest store here in the neighborhood. I went to the taxes office aswell just before I did my groceries. Taxes keeps sending me money that they own me, I don't mind though, but if or when I don't trust it I'm going to their office to ask for information.

The sum of money I was about to get from taxes this morning was quit alot, I had to fill in the paper they sent me and everything will be taken care off. But I remembered that 'that' sum of money was already sent to me, to be sure I looked on my bank account, and yes! It was there, taxes office told me that sometimes the mail they sent passes each other. It's confussing! I felt not so well today, the coughing doesn't bug me that much, but I have a pain in my thumb what I can't really describe. Probably pulled a muscle, I don't know. It started last Monday at work, my thumb felt a bit numb after some work I did.

The following days the pain felt okay, but recently the pain came back. It's annoying. When I squeeze my thumb I feel no pain, but when I push on the top of my thumb it hurts and I feel the pain going trough my whole thumb. I wish I was a Doctor, so I know what it is. I don't go to my Doctor that much, but recently I do, I don't wanna visit my Doctor for every small kinda thing. ( I have a bad experience with that) Though if the pain continues, I will go. Kinda worried here, I'm already thinking of osteoarthritis. Wednesday I will visit my Doctor if it gets worse, in the meanwhile rest, and perhaps painkillers.

Master of the mats!

Master of the mats!

Had a bit of a rough night last night, I didn't sleep that well. The little cold I have starts to develop, it's mostly the coughing in the evening and a little bit during the night what bugs me. It's the same cough I always have with a cold, I will have to cough up slime but it's thick, the tickle in my troath makes me wanna cough more, and once I cough I cough more and more. So today after work I bought a syrup specially for coughing up slime. To much information I know, lol. The coughing made me fell asleep late last night, in the very early morning a broken light bulb kept me awake aswell. This light bulb was placed in the flat hallway, just across my room. This light bulb went of and on, I could clearly see it from out of my sleeping room. Around 4:30 I got up, and fixed this annoying light bulb. I grabbed a chair and a screwdriver and took the light bulb out of the lamp. 

Fellow workers at work, a worker made this nice Instagram picture! Nice right?

I putted the broken light bulb somewhere aside on the hall way ground with a note, lol. Funny that the note plus the light bulb was still there when I got back from work, broken. But anyway, I had a good day at work. This morning when I took of my rain coat plus rain poncho and sat down in the cantine, (It pored this morning) a fellow worker told me that my second Boss wasn't coming today, he's sick. My second Boss does the orders in our section and I have to help him, very nice guy. But today he wasn't around. So, I had to do the orders and work on my own, and that went pretty good. I felt proud, I felt a boost too, like, "I will show them what I have in store." In the afternoon another fellow worker helped me out, nice. It gives a good feeling that I know what I have to do, I learned alot the last 11  months at work. First the orders with the most rush, and then the rest. 

I wanted to do my work good and I succeeded, though it was hard work. This weekend I will take it easy, were expecting alot of rain, and the warmth I will have to find in my house. I will be sitting out this little cold, with grocerie shopping I will get some extra fruit and veggies. Rest and relax is on my schedule this weekend.

Rain, rain, loving it, and I'm not complaining, rain, rain!

Rain, rain, loving it, and I'm not complaining, rain, rain. 

Suppose to be a rainy day today, but most of the rain fell in the morning. Just my luck cause I had plans in the afternoon. In the morning I did absolutely nothing, I had a power nap and that felt good. I think I slept more then a hour. I woke up a few times, and fell back asleep. Just before my lunch I turned on the washing machine, the white wash had to be done, sheets and t-shirts. I mostly wear white t-shirts under my weather or shirt. After lunch I tried one more little nap but that didn't happen, the power nap from this morning was enough. Around three 'o' clock I took of to visit a friend.. 

Her house has been renovated, and I promised to visit her a few times, but I skipped it. I know her from the free dinners where I go to, and where she recently goes to aswell, and I know her from a a few mutual friends from Humanitas. She has a 13 year old Daughter and a 9 year old Son. Some of my friends asked me today and there will probably be some talks behind my back about me liking this new female friend, well I like her but just as a friend. I even asked myself what it is actually why I like to visit her today, for sure I'm not in love with her, and it won't happen either. She's totally NOT my type! 

I found out today that I like having friends around me, real friends that I can trust (trust is important) and where I can go to for a visit, or whatever. I need that, it gives me a good feeling. Sure I see often friends from Humanitas, but they aren't really friends, it's just sometimes fun to be around them. But the trust in them is far to find, pity. More friends who I can trust please.... where it's fun to go to...

A guy...

A guy.... 

 I have not much to write or say today, work went well just like yesterday. After two hard working days I really need a day off, and that will be tomorrow. Resting in the morning and probably in the afternoon doing some groceries or cleaning, or both. I got a email back from 'Buddy wanted,' they found me a so called partner, this partner will help me find something to do in the weekend, perhaps he will help me to find a group of people where I can socialize with or better be friends with. 

I'm thinking of volunteers work, join a club, a team or a sport. This partner will help me for eight long months. That's great! But this partner is a guy, ugh, I rather had a woman, I even asked for it last week. But no! My last counselor (Sahajo) was also a guy. I talk better and clear my hear out more with women then with men, I don't know why. Maybe it's because men don't use much words. But okay, finding something is more important. 

6 months are really 6 months... and not 5!

6 months are really 6 months... and not 5!

I miss counted one month, lol. Not today I got to hear if I can stay at my work, but on 1 November. Cause from 1 May until 1 November are exactly 6 months. From 1 May untill I October are 5 months. So all the nerves from last week and the last 3 days were for nohting, lol. I will have to wait another month, another 4 weeks of nerves? Hmm, maybe just a bit. I really hope the work continues like the last 5 months, we had lots to do, lots of orders. Much work is good for my staying, I think. 

Work went well today, actually it was a nice day at work, fellow workers were goofy, work went good, without mistakes. I dislike making mistakes, when I make a mistake, I want to solve it, and I promise myself that I never make that mistake again. Making mistakes gives me a rotten feeling, though I learn from it aswell. That's positive, right? This evening I didn't went to the free dinner, I had left overs from last Saturday, and I didn't wanna throw it out. Just a calm evening for a change, though it felt weird not going, I kinda missed it aswell, next week again for sure.