Talking reliefs...

Talking reliefs...

Saf went to Hamilton  to pick up the two youngest ones in the early afternoon. The family is complete again including the noise. It was weird to see the little ones again after almost five days.. The last five days without the kids was different, it sure was quiet. This morning I was up early and felt the same as yesterday. Yesterday I thought alot of how it would be to be back in Holland, and how I will miss this family here, It will sure be different! I felt the same way this morning, I needed again a talk with Saf. (Will I ever stop?) Just to satisfy me, just to be sure of things, to calm me down. I talked to Saf just before she took of for her journey to Hamilton. I started the talk with how I felt, I just didn't know how to start the conversation, I was nervous, and I stumbled.

I told her about my friend and what he will be doing for me, Saf responded friendly. I told her that I need friendly people around me at the moment, and that I would like her to be friendly, "You seem a bit cold lately and ignorant", I said to her, "Or is it just me?".  Saf was nice in her responses and then she told me she had to get ready to pick up the kids. I felt better after the talk, It's just what I needed. Sometimes I have that feeling that there all against me, and all because of this break up. Saf brought aswell Noor (the 16 year old daughter) who lives with her Father in Hamilton. She's friendly and talks alot and is not afraid in her sayings. She knows about the breakup but she didn't mentioned anything yet.

Later tonight there were a few things going on, the kids were not listening. It was late and Saf was taking a nap before her night shift, the kids were making noise and Noor was in charge, and I helped her out a bit. Later on Saf went to work and left the 16 year old daughter in charge of the two little ones. By meaning putting them to bed in Saf's sleeping room. And she did, but in a different way then we normally do. One of us always stays with them until they sleep, but Noor putted a movie on for them and  took off to the garage with the other girls. Ofcource Ab came downstairs a million times.

I went to the garage to tell the girls that Ab has woken up. I thought "I'm  again watching the kids, what would have happen if I wasn't here right now. There' all in the garage and I'm watching the kids, I don't mind, but It was not my duty to take care of them, Noor was in charge. Today I asked my Aunt to be prepared to ask my Dad for money (again) sigh! I'm nervous that I can't buy the ticket for my flight, I want to get it done and be just over with. Maybe after Christmas, cause everyone is now focused on the holidays. I'll keep my fingers crossed.