How beautiful it is to do nothing, and then to rest afterward. ~Spanish Proverb.

How beautiful it is to do nothing, and then to rest afterward.  ~Spanish Proverb.

It was my plan to do not much today, and I kind off succeed. My body and mind were telling me to take it easy, and so I did. I was cold last night in bed, I covered myself with one sheet more, and putted on socks, socks helps always. I don't like coldness in the night, I rather have it warm, but the weatherforecast didn't forespell a cold night though, it must have been me then. I did my laundry early this morning, 7 am and the machine was spinning. The first washingmachine on the second floor didn't work, I putted the laundry in the machine, added some washing powder and pushed the start button, but nothing happened. No electricity, no lights, not working!

I looked around in the washing room and saw a little note behind me saying, "Washing machine defect." Sigh! Why would someone put a note there and not in front of the washing machine! I took out the laundry and used my hands and fingers to get the washing powder back in the bag, and went to the first floor to the other washing machine. That one worked fine, thank God! It was time for the coffee break, and the cleaning chores, but I skipped the chores, when the staff asked me,"What are you going to clean?" I told them that it's always the same people who are cleaning, when it comes to cleaning most of the people take off. I work Monday's Tuesday's, and Thursdays, and today I have a day off resting. I told the staff that I have aswell an appointment at 10:30 am.

So, no cleaning chorses today. I really don't mind cleaning but, it doesn't have to be always the same people. At 10:00 I went to my appointment, CWI was expecting me for delivering (finally) all the files for my form for the extra money. I was slightly a bit nerves, cause I might have forgot something. And I didn't want to be sent back and wait another week, but it went fine, all went well. I will get a message back from CWI if they confirm with the extra money, and i f they have questions, I keep my fingers crossed. TGIF, yeah, it's the weekend again, the weather forecast talked about rain. I haven't planned much this weekend, rest will be on my schedule for sure. It will be one of those days again I guess, then you are feeling fine and then suddenly it hits you again, 'Sadness.' 

I thought I was okay, not healed from my grieving though, but just feeling okay and slightly better with the 'missing' feelings. I just don't know what to think, sometimes it flashes shortly trough my mind that unfair feeling  of, 'they' have fun in Canada and I'm going trough this mess.' I should not think that, I know, cause that is unfair too. Our realtionship has ended, and  life goes on for both of us. The 'No contact' is going okay, but so now and then I have it hard, I just don't want to forget them. Will it be better to forget them? In my thoughts it's not right to forget them, cause we spent time together. Keeping the memories is nice but sometimes it's though to think of them, not always though, I'm doing alot better then a few months ago. But still just that sometimes, 'Beng!' ugh!

The memories are better for later, when I'm all settled and be ready for memories. The 'no contact' is needed now. This needs time and I know these difficult feelings and thoughts will pass, ups and downs are normal. Sometimes I wish that things would go a bit faster though, but okay. While I'm writting this the neighbor knocked on my door, if I wanted spaghetti with sauce and meatballs, he had plenty left overs. Sure I would love some, I ated one plate with him and his Family, I told him that I bought a little cake this afternoon, then he asked me if I wanted to join them for a drink later in the evening. I was happy with the offer and told that I will be there, nice!

So, yeah later in the evening he picked me up and I brought the cake and went a floor higher. It was nice sitting with them, we talked alot, and we drank some drinks. Bacardi Cola, I had three glasses and that was enough for me. It was more Bacardi then Cola, geesh! But it was fun. Time to go to bed now, see ya"ll!