Spring is here?

Spring is here? 

This is the third day with absolutely gorgeous weather, the sun is high in the sky, and it's not even cold. In Holland the Spring is mostly early, if it stays like this, I'm sure I won't complain. Today was a quit a good day, some ups and downs but okay, I'm steady moving on. There was a E-mail sent to me and that caused the downs today and last night, I still don't know who sent me the mail but who ever sent it, that wasn't so nice and what was written in that mail didn't do me good. According to the sender is Saf seeing another man, I didn't know last night if I should believe it or not, and you know what? It doesn't matter to me aswell. Ofcource, it hurts, I was sitting on the bed and stared at the wall for more then 20 minutes after reading that mail, I felt confussed and asked myself why many times. 

Why would someone sent me such a message? Why would Saf date another man so quickly? I just don't know. What can I do with it? Nothing! It hurts and that's all, Should I try to inform more about this, or ask her? No way! It will only give me more hurt! I'm done with this all, I need to continue and close the page, even though it's painfull. What Saf does is her own bussiness now, even though I find it akward and weird IF it's true that she is seeing someone else so fast. Anyway, I don't mind, it's time to leave it all behind me! So now and then I will message the kids to see how they are doing. Just a little chit chat about nothing, showing that I still care about them. But further no contact.

Like I said, today was a beautifull day, and.... I had a little date. (Woot!) My counseler at Humanitas and I went out to the market, It was time for me to look for a new cell phone, so we both had a look at some phone shops. We saw lots of phones for good prices, 20 Euro, 30 Euro, I don't need a cell phone with lots of extra's, I need to call and message and that's all. We informed for the prices and I think next week I will buy one, first I need to save a little more money. When our so called date was done we walked back and we talked, about life and Canada, sigh! I would like to close the page 'Canada,' but sometimes it just goes by itself when I or someone else brings it up. Almost arriving at Humanitas, my counseler bought for us both an ice-cream and I told her, "Next time it's my turn to buy one." 

You know where I'm happy with? That at the moment I can enjoy every little thing what happens to me, even small things, good things. Like for example the job I have now, I enjoy it, and I'm looking forward to my next 'real' job. If I look back, let's say 7 or 8 years in my life, I wouldn't  even dare to think about work. Maybe it's because when I came back from Canada, I had absolutly nothing, and now I'm getting the things slowly back what I had before, and those things make me happy. Things are slowly begin to settle, what I think is a miracle, cause I would never have thought that this would work out. And that is making me happy, I hope I have more in store! I'm more then ever ready for my future! Let's get it on!

Another mail I got today from my bank, (ING) it was my users name for online banking. I get a second letter from ING, telling me that I can pick up the password for online banking at my bank. I hope I don't screw up again like last time. Last time, just before leaving for good to Canada I asked aswell for online banking, it would come in handy when I'm overseas. But I screwed up, cause when I wanted to log in, I lost my password, (a black out!) I tried three times but after the third time, it blocked. And I couldn't get in, I needed to ask a new password but that would take me more then three weeks, and we didn't had time for that. The plane left in two days, bummer. Crossing my fingers this time.

I will get more mail from ING, they will send me next week the last bank statements from the last three months, I need them fast for my extra income. The guy from CWI wanted to look into some important documents, so he can decide if I have the right for that extra income. I waited more then five weeks for the bank statements now, finally they here!  Yay!