"Long weekend."

"Long weekend."

The last three days were long, I had enough to do and that made the days go faster, but still the days were long. It's Sunday evening now, pffeeww, I'm glad it's Monday tomorrow. I rest alot today, I was tired and Sunday's are perfect to rest. The appointment with Sandra was good, but I rather have Paula. She's more straight to the point, next week she will be back. I'm doing well Sandra told me, the guilt for my care-allowance has been paid. (Woot!) Today I asked again for the care-allowance, I did the asking trough internet. Sandra helped me out.

I knew what to do and if I didn't know something then Sandra would fill it in, perfect. The care-allowance will give me a bit of extra money monthly, I had care allowance for years. But while I was in Canada I forgot to chancel the allowance, it's not allowed ton have that when your overseas. Another thing I talked about with Sandra was looking for houses, I can do that aswell trough internet. I had difficulties with what kinda houses to search for, what rent prices, and what kinda houses, is the neighborhood okay if I found a house, etc, etc. Sandra told me that when I see a house what kinda looks nice  to you I have to react on it, if I react on it it doesn't mean I have the house right away. 

I still have a bit that 'eeek' feeling when it comes to a new house, it means a new part in my progress. It's scary and it makes me a bit anxious and nerves. I have the most chance for a new house in 'Enschede,' Enschede is a very nice city, I used to go there for shopping or just going out. I haven't been there for such a long time, even now being back in Holland I haven't been there. Reacting on houses in Enschede means aswell that when I found a house Humanitas in Almelo can't help me further, Humanitas in Enschede will help me further then. Pity though otherwise Paula would have come with me to look at the new house and informed me, and perhaps calm me, she knows me so well now.

I will look and react on houses this week, wow! It feels like a new part has started, a new part of my journey. Scary? Yes! But I guess I will be fine. I need to pay attention that I won't take the first house just like that, it has to be a nice house where I will feel comfy. I need aswell people around me, just like in Canada where I had alot of people around me, I would like that again. I want a much different life then I had before I went to Canada, I don't wanna fall in that same boring patron again. Sometimes I catch myself falling back in that patron, I dislike it but it gives a comfy/weird feeling aswell. I'm ready for something new! 


Sandra informed me about something new aswell, there is a company where you can order a person, (Oh, God my english!) who can help you with going out or build up new friends, socialize. Think of going to fitness, or other sports, or the libary, just to get out more, build up new friends, or maybe even a date. For example, I want to go to fitness but I'm not daring enough to go there, the person from that 'company,' can help me out and go with me the first time. That person can even think of something new to go out to to and he can take you with him or her. Sounds interesting, my first thought was no, cause I'm not helpless, I can take care of myself. 


But who knows, maybe it helps me to get started with something, something new. Maybe that company has more ideas to socialize then me, I will put my thoughts on it this week. It's important for me to build up some friends, it's even important for me to socialize more. My wish would be a nice 'family.' (again) Mom, me the Dad and a few kids, that would make me happy. Am I not happy now then? No, I'm okay, I'm good. Just like I mentioned yesterday, I should be happy now aswell or search for things what will make me happy, and not wait to a certain thing that makes me happy. Make yourself happy now and when you get that 'family' say to yourself, "I was happy already but now I'm even happier."