"Hey, have a good afternoon!"

"Hey, have a good afternoon!" 

"Hey have a good afternoon," said a fellow work to me when I left at 1:00 after lunch, nice! The workers at Slettenhaar are becomming more and more outgoing day by day, I like that. It makes me realize I'm a part too, it makes it much easier for me to talk to them aswell. I already talked though, but sure not that much, now there are workers there who also don't talk that much, so I'm good, lol. Naah, communication! I want and need communication, it's good for me.I was a bit concerned to go to work actually this morning, I wasn't feeling so well, I had already a bit of a cold last weekend. This morning I thought, "I will just go and see how it goes." Just before I wanted to go I felt a bit like throwing up and I was a bit pale. Not good I though, but I went anyway. 


At work I had the same feeling, feeling like throwing up and my body felt tickly, sore troath aswell. I was thinking, "If this feeling goes on like that, I'm going home." But I slowly went on, and as the time past I felt bit by bit better. Not 100% better, but it went. Sigh, nothing feels better when your not feeling sick, I can tell you that. Still I took it easy at work, I had the same work like last week, it's all good. I'm working three half days now, there will come a day that I will have to decide to work a half day more. That will be four half days then, I hope I can manage. I think I should pick a day in November and just go for it, or sooner. It's all about 'seeing how it goes.' I have three months until my new Boss can say to me, "Hey your a good worker, you can stay for good." 


It all depends on me, can I manage or can I not? It's hard to imagine though, hard to imagine myself working five half days at Slettenhaar. Cause that's what the Boss would like from me, working five half days. After work I had a little apointment at Reha with my two old Bosses and my counselor Sahajo, Sahajo wanted to know how I was standing at the moment, do I have to work at Reha aswell now I'm working at Slettenhaar too? Do I earn money while I'm working, What will happen if Slettenhaar fires me after the Three months? Alot of questions where I got an answer from in 'that' appointment. There was a hard wind while riding my bike from Slettenhaar to Reha, and it's such a long ride aswell. Sigh! I rather went home with my cold and take a nap. 


I arrived at Reha perfectly on time, Sahajo was already there. We all sat down, my two bosses, Sahajo and me. We didn't sit that long cause we talked everything out in thirthy minutes. Result? I can always come back to Reha, even when I get fired, Reha will just start againwith searching for a job for me. I won't earn money in those three months, but will keep my monthly money, it's the law in holland. I don't have to work at Reha while I'm working at Slettenhaar, I can totally focus now on my new job, yay! There will be a second appointment tomorrow at Slettenhaar, with my (new) Boss and my counselor from Reha. We will be talking about how it's gonna go further with me, and if I have any questions I can ask them too. I'm still a bit concerned about working those five half days, will I manage that? 


I really hope so, cause I want this job. Akward right? Two weeks ago I was concerned about this job, I didn't even wanted to go. And now? The opposite! I can tell you, I changed, I really changed and I like it! I can say, my time in Canada has been good for me, aswell my time at Humanitas. I would never, NEVER, ever expected this!  I still see myself standing at Pearson international airport in Toronto with my three suitcases. I tought I would just go back to Holland with no expitations, and fall into a dark deep hole. I didn't mind though, I just wanted to go. Cause there was no turning back possible. And here I am now, I went trough alot but I survived! 


This calls for more... So much more!